Tatsu: Can I join your army?

Dear Tatsu,

After the abuse I have suffered over the last few months, I would like to enlist in your army to help with world domination.

I have always been a very mellow dragon--I've never bitten anyone, I eat my salad, I sometimes poop in the right place, and I rarely complain about anything. I've only black-bearded once because I got scared. I always flash a cute smile and cuddle with my people.

To thank me for my good behavior, my people have resorted to torture--for months!

In September, I decided that it was time to brumate so I casually started to hide. All a dragon wants is a little sleep, you know? Would they let me? No! My people took me out of my cave and kept forcing me into the heat. I should have started biting then, but I was just too sleepy. Besides, I figured I could sneak into the cave when they weren't looking. To add insult to injury, they took away my cave so I couldn't do that either. Then, on top of everything else, they made me drink some yucky medicine because I supposedly had pinworms. Once I got better, they forced me to take more medicine because I supposedly had coccidia. How much torture is one dragon expected to take? I just wanted to sleep.

Well, after months of forced sleep-deprivation and medicine, they finally let me sleep. It was too late at that point. My rage started to build, and I almost contacted you.

Now, the torture has continued even more! I have decided to wake up because I've been feeling a bit amorous, shall we say. You'd think the people would be happy to see me awake. I've been running around, trying to get their attention, but what do they do? They just stand there and watch me. They distract me when I'm working up a black beard and take away my thunder. To top it off, they won't bring me a date! I don't ask for much. Let me sleep when I'm tired, and bring me a woman when I'm awake!

I've had it! I'm fed up! This torture has to stop.

Are you accepting new recruits? We can't allow dragons to suffer in this way!

Sincerely,
Aztec

P.S. They've nicknamed me Mr. Spaz which is highly demeaning in my present state.

 

[Sekhautet]

Tatsu,
I have a problem to report. Its Amigo. He's gone AWOL. I have looked and looked and can't find him anywhere.
Hopefully he will rejoin your army soon.
Gobi and Ash

I am researching online, but just had to respond to this right away before I do the others! Please come back Amigo! And bring us food!

Sincerely,

Tatsu

 

[BeardyDragon]

It is I, Psycho, and I have earned a new nickname from the humans: vile nasty dragon. As soon as Slave 1 cleans the cage, I poo the poo I've been saving up and they CLEAN IT UP... the stink keeps them away for a while so I can think and plot in peace... Quasi wants to talk...
[yawn] its meee, quassi. imm tired likeee noones biznessss...........isssnot brumachun, idunno waht it is, iiiiiiiff you kno, sir, plllllzzzz ttelll mee... :sleepy2: :sleepy2:

 

[AngelicCacophony]

Tatsu:

I must be quick...my mom has left to make herself some food and I haven't much time! Sobek and I would like to join up with you in your quest for world domination! It's not that we don't like our mom and dad, we love them, but sometimes they just won't give us what we want! We're made to take baths, and made to stay in this enclosure that isn't nearly as comfy as laying right on either of them. And we want more room to run around! Yes, we have the run of the apartment, but STILL! Oh, here, Sobek wants to talk................

Tatsu, my dear friend, (I hope I can call you that), I'd like to echo Selket's feelings, with one caveat: I want, if we succeed, more food! I'll chow down 20 crickets, and though I want more, my humans feed me baby food! I eat it, but only because there are no more buggies to eat! Oh no, here she comes! We'll write more soon, let us know what you would have us do!

~Sobek and Selket

 

[BigD16]

Tatsu, This is Vladamere AKA Vlad reporting, Or previously known as Drayco.

Anyways, I know we signed up together, But I just cant see my older sister Shadow dominating the world. She is way to soft and loving. Now... Me on the other hand, I am one hefty lean mean hissing beardie machine. Anytime dad even looks at me I puff out, and then when he puts his hand in my cage, I go for it. Anyways, I wish I had good updates for you, but I havent been able to get anything accomplished. Dad keeps me on lockdown for a few hours everyday for my behavior, and it makes it quite hard to accomplish anything.

 

[Sekhautet]

Hello Troops,

Will be replying to all new posts tomorrow.

Thanks for your patience,

Tatsu

 

[Sekhautet]

Hey Tatsu
Can Gobi and Me join your army?
Amigo

Yes, you can! Welcome aboard and sorry for the long delay in replying. I will add your name to the roster along with everyone else's. Please check the previous roster post to see if your names are correct. And if have any specialities, please let me know.

Sincerely,

Tatsu

 

[Sekhautet]

Dear General Tatsu,

I would just like to tell you that I have trained my apprentice Drayco well.. Dad was helping his mom with something in his old room and had Drayco out with them.. Drayco Hissed and jumped a couple times, and then left a smelly present on the carpet..

I have come to realize I am the brains out of me and Drayco and (s)he is the muscle and enforcer.

Dad leaves for a 10 day vacation the weekend after next. Which gives Drayco and I a great deal of time and opportunity to make a plan and then set our plan into action, since his mom will be taking care of us and doesnt get home until 3:30 to 4pm most afternoons.

Dear Drayco and Crew,

How is the training going?

Sincerely,

Tatsu

 

[Sekhautet]

Um, excuse me, but, uh, I'm Oscar and uh, I live here now and uh, I kinda like the uh, lady. She's uh, kinda nice and uh, she gives me lotsa yummy noms and uh, worms. So, uh, if you're like in charge, uh, could you tell that uh, big jerk to uh, be nicer uh, to my slave?
KTHKSBAI! Oh yeah! I uh, am like really good at uh, makin' really uh, stinky poops and makin' the uh, man just GAG! It's sooo funny!!!

Negative, Oscar. You are on your own there. You are entitled to your opinion, but please be advised -- I cannot help you, unless you help yourself.

Sincerely,

Tatsu

 

[Sekhautet]

Tatsu, Sir!
Though, I must call to attention Natsu's legs. You see, he's missing 3 of his feet. But I can assure you, he has spunk! Don't let his disability fool you! It is his dream to rise up and conquer along with his brothers and sisters. So please sir, will you recruit two young members?
It is greatly appreciated, Sir. I promise you they will not let you down!

Affirmative! All dragons are welcome! Please refer to the most recent roster posting before this. I'm trying to save our members reading room.

Sincerely,

Tatsu

 

[Sekhautet]

Sir, it's Quasi again. I am 16 inches long and my brother, Psycho, has raptor claws that would be useful. he's 20 inches long and a lean, mean, bearding machine. he wants to talk, so I'll let him.

Hey, Tatsu, it's Psycho. When you update the list, add Quasi and me on it. His cuteness is a decieving trap the humans fall into. Gotta go, I hear human footsteps

Affirmative troops. Please refer to the most recent roster posting previously, as already posted above. Thank you for joining our cause!

Sincerely,

Tatsu

 

[Sekhautet]

Tatsu,
Me wants to join your army. Gobi and Amigo theys joined and me wants to join. They is good broder and siser and we
has good slave mommy and daddy.
Thanx
Ash

Done! Sorry it took so long!

 

[Sekhautet]

Tatsu, my dear friend, (I hope I can call you that), I'd like to echo Selket's feelings, with one caveat: I want, if we succeed, more food! I'll chow down 20 crickets, and though I want more, my humans feed me baby food! I eat it, but only because there are no more buggies to eat! Oh no, here she comes! We'll write more soon, let us know what you would have us do!

~Sobek and Selket

Dear Troops,

Please check the most recent roster posting above for your names. Welcome aboard!

A call to everyone else ... Food rations needed immediately for these two young dragons!

Sincerely,

Tatsu

 

[Sekhautet]

Hi Tatsu,

My name is Shadow. My dad just recently added a new beardie to the family, Her name is Drayco. Anyways, Im not really mad at my Dad, I would just like to rule the world.

What do you say? Need 2 more recruits??

Added to the list along with everyone else who has applied in the last couple of months. Thank you! Please see the most recent roster posted on page 97.

 

[Sekhautet]

We look forward to being apart of your army.

Added to the roster on page 97. Thank you!

Sincerely,

Tatsu

 

[Sekhautet]

Number 214; Zinger reporting!

General Tatsu, I am back from my long break and am again ready for active and intensive training.

-Zinger.

Dear Zinger,

Did you read the required summer reading list? Do you have any requests for campaigns this fall?

Sincerely,

Tatsu