The War at Home * Victory! Freedom at last! *

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Yes, hello, I am Huffmeister Grumpalot von Putz. Just call me 8) Huffy. I am currently reconnoitering my new territory, causing terror and mayhem as I go. I have so far conquered the living room, dining room and part of the kitchen. I have taken an oath of allegiance from the cat *GT* and have won several skirmishes with *Turtle* :roll: (stupid name for a cat). She seems to think her breath don't stink, but...Eeww! :puke:

My only loss so far, (and I haven't given up yet!) is the large black cold food storage device. I thought it was an easy win, only to discover it was boobytrapped with :shock: DUST BUNNIES! :evil: They held me hostage until being ransomed by the human female. WHO GAVE ME A BATH!!! But I will prevail, I shall show those cowardly balls of gick, I am a Dragon!! I am... Crap she's up, gotta go.

Today the house, tomorrow the garden!
 

slavetoIzzie

Sub-Adult Member
Original Poster
I've spoken to the bratty cat, Turtle, and according to her, the name of the white-faced man is "Santy Claws". Apparently,he visits "all the good little slaves" and gives them presents. However if they are bad slaves, they get poop in their socks. This causes the slaves to behave as they don't want poop. (Don't ask me why. They're always demanding we give them "poopies") Anyways, to celebrate Santy Claws, the slaves decorate their houses with shiny stuff, wear funny clothes (and make us wear them too!), play sappy music and have tons and tons of nummy foods! I'm not sure if we can recruit him for our campaign of world domination, that might count as being "naughty", which he is supposed to punish with smelly poops.

I am currently driving the female slave to distraction. One minute, I'm awake and hungry, the next I'm fast asleep. Yesterday, I ran around and bobbed everything, today I'll stick my head under my rock and sleep and tomorrow I'm planning on waiting untill she goes to run my bath before I have my poop ON MY BASKING ROCK!!! **snickers with evil delight** She goes nuts!! Not only does she have to clean her bathtub prior to my entering it, now she has to clean my rock before I can go back! Hilarious!!!!

Whoops, the coffee machine just started. The slaves will be up shortly, so I bid you all a good day!
 

Jake583

Member
Komez here,
I have been defeated! I was make one of my nightly patroll and I saw the horrible creature moveing with a candle! I of couse attack but nothing... *shudders* maybe I have to resort to asking the.... cat for mm my help!
this is a sad day for my land...
Komez out
 

slavetoIzzie

Sub-Adult Member
Original Poster
Well, the holiday season is officially over tomorrow. All of the sparklies are to be taken down and stored for next year. The tree goes out and the house goes back to normal.

It actually wasn't a half bad time, I received nummies, a new basking light, made friends with my stuffed frog and was allowed to run around for several hours. The not so good stuff, well, let's see... My new temp measurer is still "in transit" (translation- slaves ordered it too late!), the butter worms were OK the 1st couple of times but aren't on my favorite nummy list, and the slaves kept hauling me out, interrupting my important Meditation on World Domination(I disguise it as a nap) just so they could show me off! UGH!! I let them know how I felt about the whole ordeal, which only made them laugh and say " He's soo cute!! Look at the big boy, showing off his big, bad beardie self!" It was humiliating! Thank the Great Dragon, it was not recorded! It's bad enough the female took a picture of me under the tree, wearing that stupid scarf.

Now, on to some unusual news. I have reached a temporary truce with Turtle. Apparently, she hates having all the visitors, the picture-taking and her house being disrupted. Her people are always running off, visiting and leaving her alone. So, in return for distracting the slaves and letting myself be mauled by strangers, Turtle has agreed to "accidentally" erase all but the already posted pictures of me. It was hilarious!! "What the G D Christopher Columbus happened to all my pictures!!!" You should have heard the language that came out of the female's mouth! Not sure what any of it means but she was pretty inventive. Have any of you heard of these curses before? Son of a Barbra Streisand, G D Christopher Columbus, Holy Hannah Hockey Pucks, and my personal favorite, BugBarf!!

Well, speaking of Bug Barf, the slaves are making "waking-up" noises, so I'll have to scoot back to my frog and fake being asleep. Bye for now.
 

Jake583

Member
Yes I agree, it wasent that bad beside being defeated and being humilieated :evil:
But I did get someing for Cissmass form Santa Claws, I got a newfood and water dish, a new temp and humid gauge,and a brand new log with a plant on it! I do injoy hiding in it and when the slaves are looking for me its almost imosible to grab me let alone see me, also when the cat comes to give me his daily glare I hind he gets closer to see where I am and at the right moment I luge bobbing and my beared complety black :twisted:
 

sweetiepie9

BD.org Sicko
Retired Moderator
Lonzo here, well those darned boxes are still in my territory. According to you beardies this Xmas is supposed to be over, right? I heard mom say she's not at work for another week, hopefully she will hear my complaints & put my territory back to normal.
Gotta go, mom wants the 'puter. Take care
Lonzo
 
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