Tatsu: Can I join your army?

Dear Tatsu,

After the abuse I have suffered over the last few months, I would like to enlist in your army to help with world domination.

I have always been a very mellow dragon--I've never bitten anyone, I eat my salad, I sometimes poop in the right place, and I rarely complain about anything. I've only black-bearded once because I got scared. I always flash a cute smile and cuddle with my people.

To thank me for my good behavior, my people have resorted to torture--for months!

In September, I decided that it was time to brumate so I casually started to hide. All a dragon wants is a little sleep, you know? Would they let me? No! My people took me out of my cave and kept forcing me into the heat. I should have started biting then, but I was just too sleepy. Besides, I figured I could sneak into the cave when they weren't looking. To add insult to injury, they took away my cave so I couldn't do that either. Then, on top of everything else, they made me drink some yucky medicine because I supposedly had pinworms. Once I got better, they forced me to take more medicine because I supposedly had coccidia. How much torture is one dragon expected to take? I just wanted to sleep.

Well, after months of forced sleep-deprivation and medicine, they finally let me sleep. It was too late at that point. My rage started to build, and I almost contacted you.

Now, the torture has continued even more! I have decided to wake up because I've been feeling a bit amorous, shall we say. You'd think the people would be happy to see me awake. I've been running around, trying to get their attention, but what do they do? They just stand there and watch me. They distract me when I'm working up a black beard and take away my thunder. To top it off, they won't bring me a date! I don't ask for much. Let me sleep when I'm tired, and bring me a woman when I'm awake!

I've had it! I'm fed up! This torture has to stop.

Are you accepting new recruits? We can't allow dragons to suffer in this way!

Sincerely,
Aztec

P.S. They've nicknamed me Mr. Spaz which is highly demeaning in my present state.

 

[Sekhautet]

Haha... it should be Zak n Wheezie's army.

Sorry... PFC Lindy means no disrespect Lord Tatsu!

None taken. I do have a sense of humor. *Tatsu winks slyly* :mrgreen:

 

[maxattack]

Lord Tatsu,

Buttercup here. Requesting admittance into your army. Sending supers ASAP. Have you considered invading Germany first? We could enlist the help of the "German Giants" in our noble quest for world domination.

 

[melissajo29]

Boris reporting,
I like the idea of going to Germany to work with the german giants. I have german giant ancestry and would like very much the opportunity to work with my ancestors in ridding Germany of evil petstore torture......

 

[Sekhautet]

Dear Buttercup and Boris,

I added your name to the previous new recruit list posted yesterday to save a little scrolling message room.

Welcome aboard!

Germany is certainly another option.

I love Belgian chocolate and German Giants are useful, yes.

However, I was thinking the most logical jump would be to Scotland from England. If we look at a map ...

What does everyone think?

Sincerely,

Tatsu

 

[sunkist]

Tatsu,

Switzerland might be an option also. There seems to be something there called a "swiss army knife" seems like we might be able to strap it to our backs for use when needed.

Your dear servant,

Lindy

 

[Bamberz1977]

Tatsu,

Switzerland might be an option also. There seems to be something there called a "swiss army knife" seems like we might be able to strap it to our backs for use when needed.

Your dear servant,

Lindy

Unfortunately the Swiss Beardie population would remain neutral.

Morris

 

[burt1016]

ok can i join the army?

Sure, as soon as I have a dragon name to add to the list? Is your dragon's name Burt? Or something else?

Thanks,

Tatsu

its burt

 

[dragon2nick1]

ok can i join the army?

Sure, as soon as I have a dragon name to add to the list? Is your dragon's name Burt? Or something else?

Thanks,

Tatsu

its burt

welcome burt im saphira :wink:

 

[dragon2nick1]

ok can i join the army?

Sure, as soon as I have a dragon name to add to the list? Is your dragon's name Burt? Or something else?

Thanks,

Tatsu

its burt

welcome burt im saphira :wink:

lots of quotes

 

[Tatty]

General Tatsu:

Your humble servants Bob, Tatty, and Popcorn look forward to going to Scottland. We have freed numerous beardies from bondage in our quadrant and we are sending superworms to you and the other troops leading the way. We do, however, miss our humble female slave back in the states. We are concerned because we understand that she has auctioned off some of our kindred cichlid fish buddies that shared our abode at something called a tri-county fish auction. We fear she might be losing it. We have left five young inexperienced troops in her domicile for intelligence. After Scottland maybe we could go to Switzerland. We have some german giant ancestry in our background as well.

We await the honor of your reply.
Bob, Tatty, and Popcorn

 

[burt1016]

ok can i join the army?

Sure, as soon as I have a dragon name to add to the list? Is your dragon's name Burt? Or something else?

Thanks,

Tatsu

its burt

welcome burt im saphira :wink:

thanks

 

[dragon2nick1]

ok can i join the army?

Sure, as soon as I have a dragon name to add to the list? Is your dragon's name Burt? Or something else?

Thanks,

Tatsu

its burt

welcome burt im saphira :wink:

thanks

No problem

 

[Sekhautet]

General Tatsu:

Your humble servants Bob, Tatty, and Popcorn look forward to going to Scottland. We have freed numerous beardies from bondage in our quadrant and we are sending superworms to you and the other troops leading the way. We do, however, miss our humble female slave back in the states. We are concerned because we understand that she has auctioned off some of our kindred cichlid fish buddies that shared our abode at something called a tri-county fish auction. We fear she might be losing it. We have left five young inexperienced troops in her domicile for intelligence. After Scottland maybe we could go to Switzerland. We have some german giant ancestry in our background as well.

We await the honor of your reply.
Bob, Tatty, and Popcorn

Carry on troops! Good work!

 

[Sekhautet]

quote="burt1016"]

ok can i join the army?

Sure, as soon as I have a dragon name to add to the list? Is your dragon's name Burt? Or something else?

Thanks,

Tatsu

its burt

Dear Burt,

Welcome aboard and I am adding your name to our list below!

Tatsu's Recruits

1) Spike (Scientific Designer and Advisor/Foreign BD-Fu Dojo Coordinator)
2) Puff (Leading Technician/Professor)
3) Aztec
4) Fergison (Official Forager for the army)
5) Hugh
6) Twitch
7) Ming
Scamps
9) Felix (Beardie Stealth Jedi)
10) Oscar (Ground Rumbling Master)
11) Izzie (Electrical specialist)
12) Ziggy
13) Yoshi
14) Rand (The Dragon Reborn)
15) Sonic
16) Soxs
17) Sol
1 Indiana (Assistant Forager for the army)
19) Thor (The Dark Side of the Force Enforcer)
20) Digger (Our XBOX Expert) CODE NAME: The Scrounger
21) Drake (Blueberry Devil)
22) Blaise (Passed Over the Rainbow Bridge in Loyal Service)
23) Lazarus (Our Poet Laureate)
24) Goober
25) Fido
]26) Houdini (Australian Lizard Correspondent)
27) Quetzalcoatl
2 Bill
29) Porky (The Official Master of Head Stuck In Places Dragon Techniques
30) Faeor
31) Gizmo
32) Griffin (Playstation Expert # 2)
33) Puppy (Our Secretary and Publisher of the monthly newsletter)
34) Komode
35) Goddard
36) Rufus (Morse Code Master
37) Yongee (Code name: Light Foot)
3 Deuce
39) Lord Dante Caius, (Master of Manipulation and Influential tactics and Second in Command of The Music Council)
40) Kip (Commander of All Things Strawberry, who passed over The Rainbow Bridge in loyal service)
41) Draco
42) Mac Daddy G. Puffort (Head of Music Council)
43) Dino Dinkum
44) Snow
45) Leo the Great
46) Manheim
47) Fabio
48) Pete
49) Kahli
50) Sunny
51) Kira (Escape Artist Extraordinaire)
52) Sarge
53) Tydo
54) Kaiju
55) Bindi (The Hogwarts Correspondent, Leader of the Potter Magic Council)
56) Fallyn
57) Gigantor
58) Isabel the Wily (Official Musk Mare Wrangler)
59) Spike (A Female Beardie!)
60) Trixie
61) Sandy
62) Bella
63) Sparky
64) Dirk
65) Izzy
66) Chupes
67) Dameon (Master of BD-Fu and Coordinator of U.S. Dojos)
68) Agor (Dameon's Sidekick who has faithfully passed over The Rainbow Bridge in courageous duty)
69) Queenie
70) Cosmo
71) Colossus
72) Bootsie (Internet Coordinator)
73) Foster
74) Waffle
75) Spike (Zelda's Spike)
76) Harlee
77) Zelda
78) Daliz
79) Saphira (The School Headmaster)
80) Eragon
81) Sophia
82) Olivair
83) Curly (Master of the Head Bob)
84) Sweet Pea
85) Phebe
86) Boris
87) Frilly (the frilled dragon )
88) Rocky
89) Merlin
90) Sunny
91) Ahmed
92) Talon
93) Landon
94) Leah
95) Hallie
96) Swatke
97) Tryxi (Master of Tricks)
98) Spazz
99) Aprhodite (Master of Spies)
100) Phoenix (Escape Extraordinaire)
101) Ian
102) Phoenix
103)Juno
104) Beardie (Communications Expert)
105) Duke (Tactical Officer/Secret Agent)
106) Dunklezahn (The Pet Rock With Legs/Force Recon:Spotter/Scout)
107) Dante
108) Randal
109) Puff
110) Juno - Amphibious Assault Specialist
111) Bobo the Basset Hound
112) Elliott Claus (Master of Deception and Confusion)
113) Charmander
114) Leonidas (King of Beardie Sparta)
115) Kelekona
116) Mater
117) Garda (Heavy Support)
118) Spike
119) Lizzy
120) Patas
121) Diver The Terrible
122) Nefertiti
123) Galadriel
124) Kang
125) Seshat
126) Fibonnaci The Fabulous
127) Astarte
128) Midori
129) Phebe
130) Skoot (Computer Specialist)
131) Buda
132) Moose
133) Charlie (Escape Artist: The Dragon Of Stealth)
134) Tango
135) Taser
136) Mike: Force Recon/Close Quarters Combat Specialist
137) Kudra: Force Recon/ Advanced Sniper Tactics
138) Scarlet (Stealthy Ninja Specialist)
139) Fudge
140) Storm
141) Neato
142) Keirra (Blue Devil's Queen)
143) Falcor (Spy)
144) Rocky (Watchman)
145) Elvis
146) Inanna
147) Buddy the dog (Spy)
148) Bently the Turtle (Computer Expert)
149) Bite (the cat)
150) Morris
151) Mojo
152) Sahara
153) Hunter
154) Spike (stealth and sniping specialist)
155) Sherbert (The master double-crosser)
156) Ish
157) Jake
158) Jazzy
159) Loiosh
160) Thorn
161) Xerces
162) Busy Izzy
163) Malibu (Master of Mayhem)
164) Sandy (Advanced Nuclear Tactics Captain)
165) Daffy
166) Chester
167) Gryphon
168) Spyro (Resident Angel and Protector of Beardies & Owners)
169) Jasper
170) Boog
171) Puph
172) Yoshi
173) Petrie
174) Sinclair (Master of the Flying Squirrel Dive Bomb)
175) Eingana Draigon
176) Tatty
177) Bob
178) Popcorn
179) Cheeto (Native Medicine Man....err Dragon Healer)
180) Loki
181) Percilla (Queen of the desert)
182) Cowboy
183) Joel
184) Gordie
185) Digger
186) Barnabus
187) Fireball
188) Quincy
189) Frankie (The Rhino Iguana)
190) Galileo
191) Thoth
192) Sydney Clay
193) Yoshi
194) Bronte
195) Oliver
196) Saphira
197) Lindy
198) Fred the gecko
199) Itty Bitty (escape artist/ surviving prisoner of war)
200) Private Blaze (also in training to be escape artist and special tactics)
201) Zak-n-Wheezie (special officers/diversion specialists)
202) Baby Bender
203) Ms. Tiggs (clerical- communications expert)
204) Checker’s (special tactics/diversion specialist)
205) RD - Mess Hall Supervisor
206) Ms. Piggy
207) Buttercup
208) Boris
209) Burt

 

[slavetoIzzie]

Izzie Izard, Electrical Specialist, reporting,

General Tatsu, I have completed the Behavioral Modification Wave (BMW) and just finished encoding it for use on portable communication devices, such as laptops and cell phones.

Attention, all troops! Please copy the following line of code into your communication devices!
748rydhfh837y4ydhfjhdsoer888[''';liuujjjzdiur48_34938489udjnfce84y2q5hqjru23y84u

With this, you will be able to control most humans that are within range of the BMW. Unfortunately, some humans are immune to it and will still need to be subdued in the traditional manner.

Good luck, and safe journey on your way to liberate the rest of Europe!