Tatsu: Can I join your army?

Dear Tatsu,

After the abuse I have suffered over the last few months, I would like to enlist in your army to help with world domination.

I have always been a very mellow dragon--I've never bitten anyone, I eat my salad, I sometimes poop in the right place, and I rarely complain about anything. I've only black-bearded once because I got scared. I always flash a cute smile and cuddle with my people.

To thank me for my good behavior, my people have resorted to torture--for months!

In September, I decided that it was time to brumate so I casually started to hide. All a dragon wants is a little sleep, you know? Would they let me? No! My people took me out of my cave and kept forcing me into the heat. I should have started biting then, but I was just too sleepy. Besides, I figured I could sneak into the cave when they weren't looking. To add insult to injury, they took away my cave so I couldn't do that either. Then, on top of everything else, they made me drink some yucky medicine because I supposedly had pinworms. Once I got better, they forced me to take more medicine because I supposedly had coccidia. How much torture is one dragon expected to take? I just wanted to sleep.

Well, after months of forced sleep-deprivation and medicine, they finally let me sleep. It was too late at that point. My rage started to build, and I almost contacted you.

Now, the torture has continued even more! I have decided to wake up because I've been feeling a bit amorous, shall we say. You'd think the people would be happy to see me awake. I've been running around, trying to get their attention, but what do they do? They just stand there and watch me. They distract me when I'm working up a black beard and take away my thunder. To top it off, they won't bring me a date! I don't ask for much. Let me sleep when I'm tired, and bring me a woman when I'm awake!

I've had it! I'm fed up! This torture has to stop.

Are you accepting new recruits? We can't allow dragons to suffer in this way!

Sincerely,
Aztec

P.S. They've nicknamed me Mr. Spaz which is highly demeaning in my present state.

 

[Tatty]

Bob, Popcorn, and Tatty reporting General Tatsu:

We are still near the Canadian Border and are working covertly to help assist any Northern U.S./Canadian Beardies gain their claim to freedom. We would like to try to contact Duke to see if we could rendevous at O'Hare and assist in any way possible with the U.K. Beardies. We are committed to our goal although I have to say that I miss our human female slave in Central Illinois greatly because she is under my control and goes out of her way to assure our comfort after I send a subliminal mind message for her to do so. I think if I had an opportunity to spend more time on mind control, she could be a willing convert to our efforts. What do you think Tatsu?

YOur loyal recruits:
Bob Popcorn Tatty :idea:

 

[burt1016]

is this the longest post ever... whats a beardie army and uh what do you do...

 

[duke11]

Well, before we erase your memory of everything you saw here...

Tatsu's army is an army for pet bearded dragons who want to break free and free other beardies from pet stores. Right now, we are on a mission in the UK freeing the beardies there. Ask Tatsu if you can join in another post. Include your name. We have slaves (or humans) but technically they don't really listen to everything we want they're pretty much just humans. We post of updates of our human's behavior and store away food and weapons. Every now and then, we lead an attack in attempt to free the beardies trapped in petstores. We are in the UK in one of our biggest missions yet! Join soon so you can come with me and all the other left behind troops on Friday to O'hare. Read my message for more info.

EDIT: Saphira and all other left behind recruits, if you would like a lift to the UK please meet me at Panda Express chinese food place at 11:39 pm sharp on Friday at O'Hare airport in Chicago IL. Don't be late- we'll leave without you! Please reply if you'd like a lift, I'd like to know how much food I should bring. All left behind troops should arrange to come- everyone else is in the UK!

As for you, human...
you will forget all that you saw here and you will teach your beardie to use the computer... then you will go and feed him/her all the bugs he/she wants... you will obey... you will obey... you will obey!

 

[duke11]

Izzie,
Forgot to mention, the troops from your sector are great! There were so many... I was able to make 4 quadrants out of them! That's 4 pet stores, dominated. I almost forgot how big Canada was. The turtle Bently is teaching me so much. Mathematics, geography, history, language arts, reading, health, science, chemistry... in chemistry, I even brewed up a potion that made the human puke! :lol: Thanks for organizing them all. Of course with more than 2,000 beardies (midwest, mountain, and the appalachian highlands regions plus Canada), it was hard to keep quiet on the plane with such a long flight. But your troops were a big help!

Duke

 

[slavetoIzzie]

Duke, I've decided that my presence here is more important to our mission, so will remain in Canada. My behavioral modification satellite has been tested on the slave of a new recruit. There was a minor glitch but all seems to be working now. The effects of the satellite signal is expanding slowly but growing daily. Once it has reached full strength, I'll pass you the codes to enable you to manipulate specific people, even non-slaves! Please extend my praise to my troops and I look forward to news of our triumph over the British petshops!

 

[dragon2nick1]

ya I want to come.




dragon in training, Saphira

 

[duke11]

We only had 4 left behind recruits on the flight last night. We are finally all here! We have 6 quadrants. Troops, please read this! It will tell you what quadrant you are in! Here are the quadrants:

Quad 1- Northern England
Quad 2- Southern England
Quad 3- Western England
Quad 4- Eastern England
Quad 5- Central England
Quad 6- All beardies remaining at home watch your humans!

Here are the assignments:
Quadrant 1- Canadian troops
Quadrant 2- Bob, Tatty, and Popcorn's midwestern troops
Quadrant 3- All troops who arrived yesterday (Saphira, you are one of them), Tatsu's troops from the Southern region, all troops from other countries, and Hawaiian and Alaskan troops
Quadrant 4- Curly and your New England troops
Quadrant 5- Duke (me) and my Appalachian Highlands and Mountain region troops
Quadrant 6- All beardies who are still in their homeland watch your humans for suspicious behavior! Also, those in Australia, keep on working with the wild beardies!

Tatsu, does this look ok to you? Quadrants 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6, you will have 2 weeks to try to free as many pet stores as possible. Meet at midnight 2 weeks from today at Big Ben! We will then depart to the other countries of Europe. Then we will finally report home and leave for Asia! Then Canada! Then the US! And so on!

 

[FireWolf181]

sorry ir but their isnt eough time to be formal

i have escaped my prisn and met up with 27 wild beardies all ready to fight for our cause and i have been sneakng into the "house" to make reports but i must flee now the human is still searching for meand i dont want to risk being spotted

So im outta here sir

 

[Sekhautet]

Tatsu, does this look ok to you? Quadrants 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6, you will have 2 weeks to try to free as many pet stores as possible. Meet at midnight 2 weeks from today at Big Ben! We will then depart to the other countries of Europe. Then we will finally report home and leave for Asia! Then Canada! Then the US! And so on!

The plans look great. Thanks for all the help, everyone. I have been preoccupied with taking care of my human slave. While I do not like her imprisonment, I do feel a twinge of sadness that she has been so sick lately. My time has been devoted to nursing her back to health, but I am checking in here too. :mrgreen:

Sincerely,

Tatsu


To Saphira (Dragon in Training):

My beardie memory is tired from all my computer research late at night. Do I need to add you to our list of recruits, or was your post simply agreeing to travel to Europe with us?

Thanks,

Tatsu


To All Volunteers:

Thank you for all your hard work. I know it is hard to be away from home and on foreign soil.

Viva la revolution!

Tatsu

 

[dragon2nick1]

Tatsu, yes I would like to join your army.(Do I have to pay?)
Sincerely, Saphira

 

[Sekhautet]

Dear Saphira,

I have added you as recruit #196. Welcome! And yes, a few supers mailed my way would be greatly appreciated.

Sincerely,

Tatsu


To All Troops,

It is long overdue, and I am sorry that I was not informed earlier, but it has come to my attention that a loyal and courageous member of ours has fallen. Please join me in a moment of silence for Jasper.

Thank you for your service friend. You will be missed.

Sincerely,

Tatsu

Tatsu's Recruits

1) Spike (Scientific Designer and Advisor/Foreign BD-Fu Dojo Coordinator)
2) Puff (Leading Technician/Professor)
3) Aztec
4) Fergison (Official Forager for the army)
5) Hugh
6) Twitch
7) Ming
Scamps
9) Felix (Beardie Stealth Jedi)
10) Oscar (Ground Rumbling Master)
11) Izzie (Electrical specialist)
12) Ziggy
13) Yoshi
14) Rand (The Dragon Reborn)
15) Sonic
16) Soxs
17) Sol
1 Indiana (Assistant Forager for the army)
19) Thor (The Dark Side of the Force Enforcer)
20) Digger (Our XBOX Expert) CODE NAME: The Scrounger
21) Drake (Blueberry Devil)
22) Blaise (Passed Over the Rainbow Bridge in Loyal Service)
23) Lazarus (Our Poet Laureate)
24) Goober
25) Fido
]26) Houdini (Australian Lizard Correspondent)
27) Quetzalcoatl
2 Bill
29) Porky (The Official Master of Head Stuck In Places Dragon Techniques
30) Faeor
31) Gizmo
32) Griffin (Playstation Expert # 2)
33) Puppy (Our Secretary and Publisher of the monthly newsletter)
34) Komode
35) Goddard
36) Rufus (Morse Code Master
37) Yongee (Code name: Light Foot)
3 Deuce
39) Lord Dante Caius, (Master of Manipulation and Influential tactics and Second in Command of The Music Council)
40) Kip (Commander of All Things Strawberry, who passed over The Rainbow Bridge in loyal service)
41) Draco
42) Mac Daddy G. Puffort (Head of Music Council)
43) Dino Dinkum
44) Snow
45) Leo the Great
46) Manheim
47) Fabio
48) Pete
49) Kahli
50) Sunny
51) Kira (Escape Artist Extraordinaire)
52) Sarge
53) Tydo
54) Kaiju
55) Bindi (The Hogwarts Correspondent, Leader of the Potter Magic Council)
56) Fallyn
57) Gigantor
58) Isabel the Wily (Official Musk Mare Wrangler)
59) Spike (A Female Beardie!)
60) Trixie
61) Sandy
62) Bella
63) Sparky
64) Dirk
65) Izzy
66) Chupes
67) Dameon (Master of BD-Fu and Coordinator of U.S. Dojos)
68) Agor (Dameon's Sidekick who has faithfully passed over The Rainbow Bridge in courageous duty)
69) Queenie
70) Cosmo
71) Colossus
72) Bootsie (Internet Coordinator)
73) Foster
74) Waffle
75) Spike (Zelda's Spike)
76) Harlee
77) Zelda
78) Daliz
79) Saphira (The School Headmaster)
80) Eragon
81) Sophia
82) Olivair
83) Curly (Master of the Head Bob)
84) Sweet Pea
85) Phebe
86) Boris
87) Frilly (the frilled dragon )
88) Rocky
89) Merlin
90) Sunny
91) Ahmed
92) Talon
93) Landon
94) Leah
95) Hallie
96) Swatke
97) Tryxi (Master of Tricks)
98) Spazz
99) Aprhodite (Master of Spies)
100) Phoenix (Escape Extraordinaire)
101) Ian
102) Phoenix
103)Juno
104) Beardie (Communications Expert)
105) Duke (Tactical Officer/Secret Agent)
106) Dunklezahn (The Pet Rock With Legs/Force Recon:Spotter/Scout)
107) Dante
108) Randal
109) Puff
110) Juno - Amphibious Assault Specialist
111) Bobo the Basset Hound
112) Elliott Claus (Master of Deception and Confusion)
113) Charmander
114) Leonidas (King of Beardie Sparta)
115) Kelekona
116) Mater
117) Garda (Heavy Support)
118) Spike
119) Lizzy
120) Patas
121) Diver The Terrible
122) Nefertiti
123) Galadriel
124) Kang
125) Seshat
126) Fibonnaci The Fabulous
127) Astarte
128) Midori
129) Phebe
130) Skoot (Computer Specialist)
131) Buda
132) Moose
133) Charlie (Escape Artist: The Dragon Of Stealth)
134) Tango
135) Taser
136) Mike: Force Recon/Close Quarters Combat Specialist
137) Kudra: Force Recon/ Advanced Sniper Tactics
138) Scarlet (Stealthy Ninja Specialist)
139) Fudge
140) Storm
141) Neato
142) Keirra (Blue Devil's Queen)
143) Falcor (Spy)
144) Rocky (Watchman)
145) Elvis
146) Inanna
147) Buddy the dog (Spy)
148) Bently the Turtle (Computer Expert)
149) Bite (the cat)
150) Morris
151) Mojo
152) Sahara
153) Hunter
154) Spike (stealth and sniping specialist)
155) Sherbert (The master double-crosser)
156) Ish
157) Jake
158) Jazzy
159) Loiosh
160) Thorn
161) Xerces
162) Busy Izzy
163) Malibu (Master of Mayhem)
164) Sandy (Advanced Nuclear Tactics Captain)
165) Daffy
166) Chester
167) Gryphon
168) Spyro (Resident Angel and Protector of Beardies & Owners)
169) Jasper
170) Boog
171) Puph
172) Yoshi
173) Petrie
174) Sinclair (Master of the Flying Squirrel Dive Bomb)
175) Eingana Draigon
176) Tatty
177) Bob
178) Popcorn
179) Cheeto (Native Medicine Man....err Dragon Healer)
180) Loki
181) Percilla (Queen of the desert)
182) Cowboy
183) Joel
184) Gordie
185) Digger
186) Barnabus
187) Fireball
188) Quincy
189) Frankie (The Rhino Iguana)
190) Galileo
191) Thoth
192) Sydney Clay
193) Yoshi
194) Bronte
195) Oliver
196) Saphira

 

[dragon2nick1]

Tatsu im sorry to say I haveven't gotten any supers i am to small for them as for silk worms, I am sending you some right now.

Saphira, Dragon in training

 

[burt1016]

dear fellow dragons,
how am i to join you army.

 

[Tatty]

General Tatsu:

Myself, Popcorn, and Tatty are in the Southern U.K. The human slave has relatives that live in this country and we are currently undetected in their abode. We are sending you some supers that we have obtained from the local pet stores while we have been releasing our captive brothers and sisters. As we eagerly conduct our mission, we await any further orders that you have for us General.

Your loyal soldiers,
Bob, Popcorn, and Tatty

 

[dragon2nick1]

I have some questions i would like to be answered. Do you capture people in pet shops that you raid.what do you do with bad slaves I have heard you get rid of them, but how? :study: :?: :study: these are directed at anyone who can answer them.

A confused dragon, Saphira