Jason,
I was so, so sorry to hear about the loss of your father. Is is difficult enough to lose someone that you love so much, so suddenly, without your stepmother making it worse by refusing to have a memorial service that you might attend to pay your last respects to him.
I can't imagine what she's thinking, to be so mean-spirited about allowing you to say your last goodbyes.
However, I'm sure that your father knew how much you loved him, and, as a parent, I can tell you that your love meant everything to him, and he would surely understand that this is something that you can't control. Your father is in a better place now, and there is no more pain.....and he will be looking down and watching over you for the rest of your life, because that is what parents do!
You are a fine young man, and a son that any father would be proud to have, and no matter what your stepmother does, she can never take that away from you.
I know how much you must be hurting right now, and all of us are here for you, if you need us. I'll be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time, and if you need to talk , send me a private message with your phone number, and I'll call you, if you think that it might help.
Hugs,
Denise