Tatsu: Can I join your army?

Dear Tatsu,

After the abuse I have suffered over the last few months, I would like to enlist in your army to help with world domination.

I have always been a very mellow dragon--I've never bitten anyone, I eat my salad, I sometimes poop in the right place, and I rarely complain about anything. I've only black-bearded once because I got scared. I always flash a cute smile and cuddle with my people.

To thank me for my good behavior, my people have resorted to torture--for months!

In September, I decided that it was time to brumate so I casually started to hide. All a dragon wants is a little sleep, you know? Would they let me? No! My people took me out of my cave and kept forcing me into the heat. I should have started biting then, but I was just too sleepy. Besides, I figured I could sneak into the cave when they weren't looking. To add insult to injury, they took away my cave so I couldn't do that either. Then, on top of everything else, they made me drink some yucky medicine because I supposedly had pinworms. Once I got better, they forced me to take more medicine because I supposedly had coccidia. How much torture is one dragon expected to take? I just wanted to sleep.

Well, after months of forced sleep-deprivation and medicine, they finally let me sleep. It was too late at that point. My rage started to build, and I almost contacted you.

Now, the torture has continued even more! I have decided to wake up because I've been feeling a bit amorous, shall we say. You'd think the people would be happy to see me awake. I've been running around, trying to get their attention, but what do they do? They just stand there and watch me. They distract me when I'm working up a black beard and take away my thunder. To top it off, they won't bring me a date! I don't ask for much. Let me sleep when I'm tired, and bring me a woman when I'm awake!

I've had it! I'm fed up! This torture has to stop.

Are you accepting new recruits? We can't allow dragons to suffer in this way!

Sincerely,
Aztec

P.S. They've nicknamed me Mr. Spaz which is highly demeaning in my present state.

 

[Sekhautet]

Dear Recruits,

For all those who have slaves who remodel their home without asking them ... I urge you to revolt! Tear everything apart. I know I am. The human slave got it in her head to move my tank around and add more slate. She is trying to curb my claw terror, but I am secretly sharpening them on a piece of metal I honed from a suction cup on my greenery. She will NOT win. I am making a nice shank and I will use it. :twisted:

Sincerely,

Tatsu

 

[tg_spike]

I shall revolt by pushing every thing around and tearing every peice of veg into the hardest place to clean. he will regreat ever moving me :twisted: :twisted:

Tatsu I have discovered a camera hidden within the kenedy space centre, and have succeded in producing plots of there shuttle I feel by changing the design slightly we can build a rocket powerful enough to fire missles with the deadly oxygen destroyer witch with the missle fired could turn whole citties to graveyard. Also I am designing a shuttle know as the super x 3 it will have cadium shells able to freeze up to -2000 degrees in 6 seconds, plus almighty tatsu if you do not have one I would like to be your scientific advisor and designer, please replay soon.

Your loyal servent Spike

 

[Sekhautet]

Dear Spike,

I have adjusted your title. Please make sure the rockets carry large compartments for superworms.

Sincerely,

Tatsu

1) Spike (Scientific Designer and Advisor)
2) Puff (Leading Technician/Professor)
3) Aztec
4) Fergison (Official Forager for the army)
5) Hugh
6) Twitch
7) Ming
Scamps
9) Felix (Beardie Stealth Jedi)
10) Oscar (Ground Rumbling Master)
11) Izzie (Our Playstation Expert)
12) Ziggy
13) Yoshi
14) Rand (The Dragon Reborn)
15) Sonic
16) Soxs
17) Sol
1 Indiana (Assistant Forager for the army)
19) Thor (The Dark Side of the Force Enforcer)
20) Digger (Our XBOX Expert) CODE NAME: The Scrounger
21) Drake
22) Blaise (Passed Over the Rainbow Bridge in Loyal Service)
23) Lazarus (Our Poet Laureate)
24) Goober
25) Fido
26) Houdini (Australian Lizard Correspondent)
27) Quetzalcoatl
2 Bill
29) Porky (The Official Master of Head Stuck In Places Dragon Techniques
30) Faeor
31) Gizmo
32) Griffin (Playstation Expert # 2)
33) Puppy (Our Secretary and Publisher of the monthly newsletter)
34) Komode
35) Goddard
36) Rufus (Morse Code Master
37) Yongee (Code name: Light Foot)
3 Deuce
39) Lord Dante Caius, (Master of Manipulation and Influential tactics and Second in Command of The Music Council)
40) Kip (Commander of All Things Strawberry
41) Draco
42) Mac Daddy G. Puffort (Head of Music Council)
43) Dino Dinkum
44) Snow
45) Leo the Great
46) Manheim
47) Fabio
48) Pete
49) Kahli
50) Sunny
51) Kira
52) Sarge
53) Tydo
54) Kaiju
55) Bindi (The Hogwarts Correspondent, Leader of the Potter Magic Council)

 

[slavetoIzzie]

Dear Tatsu,
The sneaky slave TRIMMED MY CLAWS!!! They were so long and sharp, with a magnificent point that just shredded the slave's skin. Gives me my bath and while I was all relaxed and sleepy, snip,snip! I feel so betrayed and violated How am I to impress the ladies with blunt claws?! And to top off the humiliation, she coos babytalk to me, saying how cute I am! I AM GIVING YOU THE DEATH GLARE, STUPID HUMAN! How am I to deal with this,this ABUSE?

 

[GiefSoul]

oh my lord, im scared

my Charlie has (in the 2 days we havent had any crickets) pooed on top of his heater, so it all melted, and on the top of his tree
he actually pulled it down and let off a big one >_>

and he just had a poo on me, and he never ever has 2 poos in one day

Tatsu, what the heck have you done to him O.O

 

[cinder]

Mighty Tatsu,
My name is Fallyn, I am quite impressed that you have 55 followers so far.
I am a female and would like to join your army, and while I am still young (just turned 4 months yesterday) I have human seducing powers and with that have access to silkies my slave will soon be breeding for me.
I have a foot missing but that only makes my seductive powers work more on my slave and her friends (seeing as they usually wear much black and are totally obsessed with being different, and missing limbs and still being adorable is pretty original.)
My slave’s computer is right below my cage and I have access to it since she tends to leave the doors of my cage open for several hours each day, and I will be contacting you.
I am having a pent house built for me and I will store the silks in a secret compartment to save for your army, but I will not be fighting against my slave, as I am quite fond of her, but will still work hard to support you and your troops.

(me sneaking out to type this letter)

 

[Sekhautet]

Dear Fallyn,

We would be honored to have you join our worthy cause. Though you may be missing a foot, you have the heart of a firece lion and that is more important to our cause.

I am adding your name to our list,

Sincerely,

Tatsu

P.S. I have never had a fresh silkie. Can you believe that? My human slave doesn't want to care for them. I have had everything else, but a fresh silkie. :x

Tatsu's Recruits

1) Spike (Scientific Designer and Advisor)
2) Puff (Leading Technician/Professor)
3) Aztec
4) Fergison (Official Forager for the army)
5) Hugh
6) Twitch
7) Ming
Scamps
9) Felix (Beardie Stealth Jedi)
10) Oscar (Ground Rumbling Master)
11) Izzie (Our Playstation Expert)
12) Ziggy
13) Yoshi
14) Rand (The Dragon Reborn)
15) Sonic
16) Soxs
17) Sol
1 Indiana (Assistant Forager for the army)
19) Thor (The Dark Side of the Force Enforcer)
20) Digger (Our XBOX Expert) CODE NAME: The Scrounger
21) Drake
22) Blaise (Passed Over the Rainbow Bridge in Loyal Service)
23) Lazarus (Our Poet Laureate)
24) Goober
25) Fido
26) Houdini (Australian Lizard Correspondent)
27) Quetzalcoatl
2 Bill
29) Porky (The Official Master of Head Stuck In Places Dragon Techniques
30) Faeor
31) Gizmo
32) Griffin (Playstation Expert # 2)
33) Puppy (Our Secretary and Publisher of the monthly newsletter)
34) Komode
35) Goddard
36) Rufus (Morse Code Master
37) Yongee (Code name: Light Foot)
3 Deuce
39) Lord Dante Caius, (Master of Manipulation and Influential tactics and Second in Command of The Music Council)
40) Kip (Commander of All Things Strawberry
41) Draco
42) Mac Daddy G. Puffort (Head of Music Council)
43) Dino Dinkum
44) Snow
45) Leo the Great
46) Manheim
47) Fabio
48) Pete
49) Kahli
50) Sunny
51) Kira
52) Sarge
53) Tydo
54) Kaiju
55) Bindi (The Hogwarts Correspondent, Leader of the Potter Magic Council)
56) Fallyn

 

[trickshot]

Tatsu,

Me Gigantor. Me still little, no understand big dragon language yet. Me tired of big ugly human taking out and petting head and beard. Me hate bath and hate human hand in me house! Me try to bite sometime, but it just laugh. It never feed me enough, so me poop on log to make it mad. It also have big thing call dog that me hate! Me want to kill dog! If you give time, me will help in cause once me better talker.

This take me half hour to type while human out getting food. Better hurry to house!

Gigantor, Destroyer of Expensive Pet Store Items

 

[tg_spike]

Sir
I have succsefuly designed capsules able to expand and contract.
They can carry any iteams we need including supers and weapons.
Plus by pumping in the micro-oxygen we can super size supers then shink them within the capsules so to help with carrying.
This will mean we can supply the army as it grows.
I finaly got in contact with nebular x, at your command they will send ghidorah the three headed space monster, and Gigan the cborg alien. I will put pictures of them soon.
Your loyal servent Spike

 

[Sekhautet]

Excellent work, Spike. I look forward to the pictures.

Dear Gigantor,

I am adding you to our list of recruits. As our army grows, we are accepting smaller recruits now. That is a big name for you to live up to. I hope you are up to the task.

Sincerely,

Tatsu

Tatsu's Recruits

1) Spike (Scientific Designer and Advisor)
2) Puff (Leading Technician/Professor)
3) Aztec
4) Fergison (Official Forager for the army)
5) Hugh
6) Twitch
7) Ming
Scamps
9) Felix (Beardie Stealth Jedi)
10) Oscar (Ground Rumbling Master)
11) Izzie (Our Playstation Expert)
12) Ziggy
13) Yoshi
14) Rand (The Dragon Reborn)
15) Sonic
16) Soxs
17) Sol
1 Indiana (Assistant Forager for the army)
19) Thor (The Dark Side of the Force Enforcer)
20) Digger (Our XBOX Expert) CODE NAME: The Scrounger
21) Drake
22) Blaise (Passed Over the Rainbow Bridge in Loyal Service)
23) Lazarus (Our Poet Laureate)
24) Goober
25) Fido
]26) Houdini (Australian Lizard Correspondent)
27) Quetzalcoatl
2 Bill
29) Porky (The Official Master of Head Stuck In Places Dragon Techniques
30) Faeor
31) Gizmo
32) Griffin (Playstation Expert # 2)
33) Puppy (Our Secretary and Publisher of the monthly newsletter)
34) Komode
35) Goddard
36) Rufus (Morse Code Master
37) Yongee (Code name: Light Foot)
3 Deuce
39) Lord Dante Caius, (Master of Manipulation and Influential tactics and Second in Command of The Music Council)
40) Kip (Commander of All Things Strawberry
41) Draco
42) Mac Daddy G. Puffort (Head of Music Council)
43) Dino Dinkum
44) Snow
45) Leo the Great
46) Manheim
47) Fabio
48) Pete
49) Kahli
50) Sunny
51) Kira
52) Sarge
53) Tydo
54) Kaiju
55) Bindi (The Hogwarts Correspondent, Leader of the Potter Magic Council)
56) Fallyn
57) Gigantor

 

[brittany]

Dear Tatsu,
Can I have the title of escape artist extraordinaire? I'm extremely good at this, as you know. I can jump long lengths, sneak in tight spaces, and I can get out of nearly any enclosure. I guess you could call me Beardini. I'll give you a fresh silkie if you make my title escape artist extraordinaire.
Kira

 

[Sekhautet]

Dear Tatsu,
Can I have the title of escape artist extraordinaire? I'm extremely good at this, as you know. I can jump long lengths, sneak in tight spaces, and I can get out of nearly any enclosure. I guess you could call me Beardini. I'll give you a fresh silkie if you make my title escape artist extraordinaire.
Kira

Done, and I expect my silkie Fed Exded ASAP!

You must be cohorts with my pal, Johnny, Gecko Escape Artist Extraordinaire, enslaved in my house.

Thank You,

Tatsu

Tatsu's Recruits

1) Spike (Scientific Designer and Advisor)
2) Puff (Leading Technician/Professor)
3) Aztec
4) Fergison (Official Forager for the army)
5) Hugh
6) Twitch
7) Ming
Scamps
9) Felix (Beardie Stealth Jedi)
10) Oscar (Ground Rumbling Master)
11) Izzie (Our Playstation Expert)
12) Ziggy
13) Yoshi
14) Rand (The Dragon Reborn)
15) Sonic
16) Soxs
17) Sol
1 Indiana (Assistant Forager for the army)
19) Thor (The Dark Side of the Force Enforcer)
20) Digger (Our XBOX Expert) CODE NAME: The Scrounger
21) Drake
22) Blaise (Passed Over the Rainbow Bridge in Loyal Service)
23) Lazarus (Our Poet Laureate)
24) Goober
25) Fido
]26) Houdini (Australian Lizard Correspondent)
27) Quetzalcoatl
2 Bill
29) Porky (The Official Master of Head Stuck In Places Dragon Techniques
30) Faeor
31) Gizmo
32) Griffin (Playstation Expert # 2)
33) Puppy (Our Secretary and Publisher of the monthly newsletter)
34) Komode
35) Goddard
36) Rufus (Morse Code Master
37) Yongee (Code name: Light Foot)
3 Deuce
39) Lord Dante Caius, (Master of Manipulation and Influential tactics and Second in Command of The Music Council)
40) Kip (Commander of All Things Strawberry
41) Draco
42) Mac Daddy G. Puffort (Head of Music Council)
43) Dino Dinkum
44) Snow
45) Leo the Great
46) Manheim
47) Fabio
48) Pete
49) Kahli
50) Sunny
51) Kira (Escape Artist Extraordinaire)
52) Sarge
53) Tydo
54) Kaiju
55) Bindi (The Hogwarts Correspondent, Leader of the Potter Magic Council)
56) Fallyn
57) Gigantor

 

[tg_spike]

Sir
I have the pictures.
Gigan

King Ghidorah

And if you accept then they will also send monster X

Your loyal servent Spike

 

[trickshot]

Excellent work, Spike. I look forward to the pictures.

Dear Gigantor,

I am adding you to our list of recruits. As our army grows, we are accepting smaller recruits now. That is a big name for you to live up to. I hope you are up to the task.

Sincerely,

Tatsu

Gigantor small now, but soon he be big. He grow much, and have big girth in belly. He leave poop in house that stink and make human cry out loud. It wet one too, since Gigantor save it for days just so it stink more. Maybe Gigantor be called Stinkor instead. But dog already call stinky fart man, so me no like.

Must go eat cricket and get fatter to make stinky poop later.

Gigantor out!

 

[Sekhautet]

Spike,

Those are formidable allies for us. Good job!

Sincerely,

Tatsu

P.S. Gigantor, if you are reading this, try throwing your vegetables around your tank and see how fast they scramble to pick them up. :mrgreen: