Frustrated

[Juce23]

Not sure what to do.. What I do know is that I'm tired of spending all the money I've spent.. Time I've spent chopping salads every week.. Running to the per store to get crikets twice a week ... Making an enclosure for the roach colony I just got.. All this for a Beardie that doesn't let me pick him up without going ape shît.. Now he's puffing up and hissing at me... My kids can't hold him either.. His temps are perfect.,and he eats better then I do... Guess I'm just lucky to get one of the nasty ones..

 

[SDragon]

What a ****ty attitude

You chose to get a bearded dragon, each lizard is individual and some just don't tame. You have my sympathy if yours is one and I appreciate it is frustrating; but he owes you nothing just because you choose to provide him the required diet and temperatures (apparently), which would have no bearing on his temprememt. Correct care is the minimum you should offer a pet, he isn't capable of gratitude.

If you want to work to try and tame your lizard then there will be a lot of people willing to help. But it may well take patience and effort.

If you want to run through how he is set up, and how he is interacted with, then some of those who have experienced similar issues will I'm sure, be able to offer guidance and you will hopefully make progress with him.

 

[AHBD]

Hi there....I can feel for your frustration, especially when you see or read of others who have friendly or at the very least, tolerant beardies. Don't give up....there are owners who tamed aggressive beardies. I can make a few suggestions, first, how big is he ? Whatever size he is if he's actually going to bite you, use a glove to pick him up. Move slowly to pick him up and keep a firm but gentle hold on him, still doing everything slowly. Keep calm because many animals sense our stress [ although i KNOW it's easier said than done ] So once you've picked him up, hold him to your chest and just sit that way for 5-10 minutes every day. Once you've done that for a week or 2, then carry him into a small warm room, like the bathroom. Then sit down on the floor + let him sit on your lap. Keep doing this until he realizes that nothing bad is going to happen. This method usually works....just be patient. Other posters may have suggestions, too but I think that you will be able to handle him eventually.

 

[Juce23]

First of all..I'm sorry if it seems I'm being a bit of a baby..lol.. I was when I posted it.. But that doesn't mean I'm going to discard him.. Or give him away. I was just venting.. I do see so many others enjoying their beardie .. So do my two daughters who picked him out and want to interact with him.. So I apologize for the way it was worded.. I enjoy doing the things I do for him..

 

[Juce23]

Now on to fixing it.. Because I do believe it can be fixed.. He doesn't seem that bad., last night when I posted it, after he hissed at me, I think I just scared him.. I put my hand bear him (the lights were out) and I think he might not have known it was me..today he ate strawberries out of my hand( my peace offering because I felt bad for hating him) and seemed fine with me being in his cage doing some cleanup.. .. He is about 13 -14 inches long.. His temps are 105 on the hit side , and between 80-85 on the cool side.. He's in a 40 gallon breeder so he has plenty of room to regulate his temps.. What I was doing with him was picking him up.. When he finally stopped squirming and trying to get away he would calm down.. I would then hold him for a few more minutes while he was calm.. I never put him back until he had calmed down..

 

[SDragon]

First of all..I'm sorry if it seems I'm being a bit of a baby..lol.. I was when I posted it.. But that doesn't mean I'm going to discard him.. Or give him away. I was just venting.. I do see so many others enjoying their beardie .. So do my two daughters who picked him out and want to interact with him.. So I apologize for the way it was worded.. I enjoy doing the things I do for him..

Fair enough, apologies if I sounded overly harsh. I've watched beardies go from an animal kept by reptile enthusiasts to an everyday pet. Which in many ways is great, but I find people expect too much of them sometimes or sacrifice their care to make them more pet like. Although I'm certainly not suggesting you do the latter, in fact the care sounds good. I do totally appreciate you would have expected to be able to interact with him more and of course your daughters would want him to.

I'd say the fact be accepted your peace offering was a really good sign. Will he eat all foods from your hands rather than just treats? (Be careful he doesn't become a prima donna and only want to be hand fed).

I think just getting him used to your presence by doing cage maintenance is a very good step that combined with some hand feeding will really build trust. I suspect as you intimated, fear is his motivation, nothing more. Will he come over to you if you have food, can you get him to walk on to your hand? I'd do this for a while try and get him to come to you, then focus on getting him out of his tank. Slow deliberate movements are key, as is confidence (which it sounds like you have).

When you say you wouldn't put him back until he stopped struggling, I understand the logic not to reward, but be careful he isn't getting heavily stressed, sometimes when they appear calm it is more a case of submission. Make sure he is still alert and inquisitive. As above maybe build up slowly to that.

You mentioned he is in a 40g breeder, what are the dimensions? Is that all glass? Is there anything that might be stressing him, pets, your daughters wanting to interact, heavy traffic near his enclosure? If it's a tank does he get disturbed when the top comes off? I would always try and put your hand into the viv as far from him as possible then approach at his level, they are sensitive to aerial threats.

Also when you say it is 105 at the hot end, is that ambient temperature or directly on the basking spot?

 

[Juce23]

You weren't harsh..lol.. It sounded exactly like what you said.. A ****ty attitude... So.. When I said I don't put him back in until he's calm.. At first he is breathing rather heavy.. But he will slow down.. And he is still alert.. Looking around.. I meant I didn't put him back into his enclosure until he stopped squirming and being hyper..

His enclose is glass.. I painted three sides.. To make him feel more comfortable.. The temp at the highest part of his basking spot is reading between 100-105.. I use a temp gun( whatever they are called.. The ones that have the red beam) the temp near the floor is reading around 90... He basks with his mouth open and sometimes will move over to a log I have in the middle of the tank and bask there.. That spot is reading around 90 as well..

Also when he hissed last night I believe he was stressed.. A few crickets I gave him escaped and made residence in his basking log.. They wouldn't **** up and he slept in a corner of the tank he normally doesn't sleep in. So he was probably as irritated by their chirping as I was.. When he puffed up and hissed, my hand was behind him.. It was dark.. He was half asleep, and I don't think he saw me coming... I was trying to grab one of the damn crickets when it was beside him.. I got them out.. Now I always feed him in his enclosure.. But I only drop them in one at a time and he always gets them all.. Just an accident that a few fell in..

 

[Juce23]

I am just trying to take it slow.. I'm trying to let him come to me instead of forcing him to be held.. I don't pick him up every day.. I guess I'm not sure what to do.. Some say just pick him up everyday, some say he will be held when he trusts you and is ready... I have mostly been using the hands off approach and he does, although slowly, seem to be getting less and less frightful.. I do pet his head and back.. Sometimes he scurries off when I get closer to his tail, but he doesn't show any signs of aggression

 

[JenFid]

Hello - it sounds like you're taking the right steps. My boy, even though he's 5 years old now and I've had him since he was just a couple months old, will still puff and hiss at me if I startle him, but he calms down very quickly when he realizes it's just me. It's just his personality.

I would still take your guy out every day, even if it's just for 5 minutes. He's not new to your household anymore, so he should get used to being held. Or if you can't hold him, at least give him some good pets every day so he gets used to your hands, and it sounds like you're doing that already.

I know it can be frustrating! I'm one of those ones with beardies who are super laid back and friendly, but I've been on your end before. It sounds like you're making progress

 

[AHBD]

Well it sounds like he's not actually too aggressive but really just a bit frightened + unsure at times. I agree with Jen, take him out daily and hold him to your chest....this usually calms them down so they are not thrashing about, feeling insecure when lifted. He'll get used to that.....and again as Sdragon mentioned do it all slowly + calmly. Also as was mentioned, your hand in the tank will also help him to see that you're no threat....but picking him up will help to condition him to being held.

 

[SDragon]

I am just trying to take it slow.. I'm trying to let him come to me instead of forcing him to be held.. I don't pick him up every day.. I guess I'm not sure what to do.. Some say just pick him up everyday, some say he will be held when he trusts you and is ready... I have mostly been using the hands off approach and he does, although slowly, seem to be getting less and less frightful.. I do pet his head and back.. Sometimes he scurries off when I get closer to his tail, but he doesn't show any signs of aggression

It's great that he isn't aggressive, I would personally keep at what you are doing building trust and see if you can get him into your hand over a couple of weeks but there is no right answer. if you think you need to bite the built and pick him up, then go for it. As long as he stays alert once the struggling stops then it shouldn't cause a lot of problems.

Let us know how he gets on, I'm sure he will be a tame dragon soon enough. It sounds like it might just take a little longer, I'm sure once he is calmer it will be all the more rewarding having gone through a bond building process.

 

[Juce23]

So I cleaned up his enclosure a bit today.. He doesn't get mad when I'm in there.. He just raises his head and looks at me.. He normally goes to the other side of the enclosure that I'm not cleaning.. I started to let him under his chin and he just backs away.. Doesn't hiss or puff up.. Just moves backwards a little bit.. I wasn't sure if I should just go ahead and pick him up.. I really would just like him to stop backing away from me.. I don't want to scare him..

 

[SDragon]

Backing away is better than running away. If you have a piece of strawberry or a worm In your hand will he keep backing away or will he come to grab it, how does he react after taking food?

 

[Juce23]

He usually takes it from me.. Today I don't think he was hungry though.. He had just eaten about 40 crickets.. But when he does take it he seems fine.. I've even put them in the palm of my hand and he puts his two front feet on my hand and stands there and eats them... He just seems very nervous all the time.. I think I am going to start getting my hands in there a bit more.. I show him my hand from the front and slowly move it towards him.. And make sure he sees me... When I touch him under the chin, he just takes a step or two backwards... Maybe I will just keep doing that until he doesn't back away anymore.. And try to pick him up when that happens.. I think I could now without fear of being bitten, but like I said, I think id rather let him come to me... As long as he's not being aggressive I think in time he will figure out that I'm okay

 

[SDragon]

I think he will too. I also think if he was a likely to bite he would have by now. Once he has two feet on one hand could you lure him further onto your hand and arm with an additional worm or treat then after he has done this a few times see if you can gently lift him out. Will he drink water from you?

I think he will come around and once he does your daughters will be able to start to enjoy him more, I'd probably let him get used to you first, maybe they could start doing a little cage maintenance?

You mentioned he is in 40g how big are the dimensions? You may need to upgrade to a bigger viv, if so something front opening would probably help him, he may be absolutely fine by then. Does he have good access to hides, and if so does he ever retreat to them?