incredibly attached

So I'm having one of those days when my emotions seem to be sitting just right on the surface....

Poncho was asleep in his blankie and had been for about 10 minutes so needless to say he was out cold. I was playing on my phone waiting for my unisom to kick in and I started listening to a song that I've decided is mine and Ponchos mommy/son song. Well of course I uncover his little head (he's still asleep bc its dark) and start singing it to him. I burst into the biggest crocodile tears, sobbing, ugly cry ever. Poncho doesn't open his eyes at all, he just crawls out and does the wiggle under my chin. He kissed my neck one time and wiggled again. He is so smart and so sweet.

I am soo scared of how attached I am. I love him more than life itself. I know that sound crazy to some people but he has saved my life. Before Poncho I was so depressed. He is the reason I wake up every morning. My motivation to fight all of my chronic illnesses. He is my soul. I can't imagine living without him ever again. I had a dachsund that I loved this much for 14 years, when he died it was like losing a child and Poncho filled that empty void in my life. Ok I know y'all think I'm nuts now so I'm going to attempt to sleep. I guess I just needed to vent so id stop crying. Ponchos poor head had a puddle of tears on it.

The song is I won't give up by jason mraz btw...youtube it if you've never heard it. It just reminds me of me saving him and loving him and how far he's come, we've come together.

 

[bunnyrut]

awww...

i'm glad he has helped you.
i try not to think about being separated from them, i really can't imagine my life without my beardie babies.

 

[TheWerewolf]

I don't think you are crazy at all. I'm going to admit a even more crazy thing, I get teary eyed with insects. Yes, you read right. Bugs, I cry for bugs. And last night I was holding Nim and his sweet little body snuggled against my hand made tears roll from my eyes. I had this chicken, Yuzu. He had a heart murmur because of a faulty incubator. He lived in the house (sounds insane, I know) But chickens are a very cleanly animal if raised right. I hatched him from the egg so I was his mommy hen. He followed me around the house and when I walked too fast he'd stand there peeping for me. It was the cutest thing. But, because of the murmur, two weeks after his first birthday he died from what I call a heart attack. He had a seizure before he died. My heart broke in two. I ran away when I saw him have the seizure. I felt sick and screamed to the heavens for my baby. I watched enough medical shows that I knew he wasn't going to make it. I mourned for one hour, the shortest hour of my life.
Some may think me insane for bonding with a chicken, but he was my baby. I still get teary when I look back at the sweet memories of Yuzu. I hope I will get the same bond with Nim. Okay, that was a long story. I'm done now.

 

[PonchoandDaddy]

You aren't crazy...I brake for butterflies I have literally slammed on brakes, slid sideways in the road and everything to keep from hitting a butterfly. I rescue turtles in the road, geese, ducks, you name it. I need a bumper sticker "stay back 500 feet...I will kill us all to save a turtle" lol.

I can totally understand the chicken thing too. My uncle (who is also my neighbor) has chickens, turkeys and a pet goose. One day a stray dog got into the chicken coop and I heard the commotion when I turned the water off in the shower. Let's just say my aunt thinks I'm nuts for climbing the fence in a towel to save the chickens. When Gertrude the goose gets lost during storms she finds my car and waits for me beside my door bc she knows I'll walk her home. I saw "gerrdy are you lost baby?" *honk* "well come on..." so I walk her up the driveway and show her how to get back across the fence. She flies to her water dish and as I turn to walk away she comes back to tell me thank you! *squeak squeak honk* lol

Our other neighbor has a chocolate lab that he doesn't take care of. I've been secretly buying him food and sneaking down there at night to feed,water, and love on him for a year now. He knows its me when I wisper "Odie come to B" and he comes running but never makes a sound like he knows its our little secret. I wonder how my neighbor thinks his dog is still alive when he hasn't fed him for over a year.

See, I'm crazy... I like it though

 

[PonchoandDaddy]

awww...

i'm glad he has helped you.
i try not to think about being separated from them, i really can't imagine my life without my beardie babies.

I try not to think about it either. I just have those damn days when my girlie side comes out and I cry over everything. (My inner girl is a rare site. I'm so tomboyish lol)

Your babies are adorable btw and I love their names. Poncho thinks his name is Baby Dragon. I can say "open your eyes dragon" and he will peek out at me and when he sees me he slams his eyes shut again! He's a mess!

 

[TheWerewolf]

You aren't crazy...I brake for butterflies I have literally slammed on brakes, slid sideways in the road and everything to keep from hitting a butterfly. I rescue turtles in the road, geese, ducks, you name it. I need a bumper sticker "stay back 500 feet...I will kill us all to save a turtle" lol.

I can totally understand the chicken thing too. My uncle (who is also my neighbor) has chickens, turkeys and a pet goose. One day a stray dog got into the chicken coop and I heard the commotion when I turned the water off in the shower. Let's just say my aunt thinks I'm nuts for climbing the fence in a towel to save the chickens. When Gertrude the goose gets lost during storms she finds my car and waits for me beside my door bc she knows I'll walk her home. I saw "gerrdy are you lost baby?" *honk* "well come on..." so I walk her up the driveway and show her how to get back across the fence. She flies to her water dish and as I turn to walk away she comes back to tell me thank you! *squeak squeak honk* lol

Our other neighbor has a chocolate lab that he doesn't take care of. I've been secretly buying him food and sneaking down there at night to feed,water, and love on him for a year now. He knows its me when I wisper "Odie come to B" and he comes running but never makes a sound like he knows its our little secret. I wonder how my neighbor thinks his dog is still alive when he hasn't fed him for over a year.

See, I'm crazy... I like it though

Yeah, I tease my mom when she breaks for frogs hopping across the road. Sometimes she hits frogs and dodges leaves. That is when I really laugh, because leaves do look like frogs. :lol: I'm glad there is another cray animal loving person out there. I even cringe every time moths hit the car when we drive at night. What can I say, I'm crazy for animals and I like it!

 

[bunnyrut]

Yeah, I tease my mom when she breaks for frogs hopping across the road. Sometimes she hits frogs and dodges leaves. That is when I really laugh, because leaves do look like frogs. :lol: I'm glad there is another cray animal loving person out there. I even cringe every time moths hit the car when we drive at night. What can I say, I'm crazy for animals and I like it!

hahaha! that reminds me of the time my mom stopped the car and literally hopped around the road trying to catch a toad so it wouldn't get hit!

i am the freak who will pick up a moth the size of my hand while everyone else runs away from "Mothra". I hate spiders, but i also hate killing them. i have a bathroom spider, and i have rescued it numerous times from the shower.

others view the attachment to animals as 'freaky' or 'weird', but i see it as people having humanity and compassion.

While people get angry that wild critters like skunks, raccoons and groundhogs are in their yards eating at their gardens, i'm waving at them and naming them.

 

[PonchoandDaddy]

Lmao! Y'all are awesome . I'm so glad I'm not the only one that loves critters like I do! The only time I've ever wanted an animal to die was the time their was a snake in my yard. Not just any snake. I saw it and my cousin was going to kill it so I'm protecting it and it lunged at me, I scolded it lmao! Then I look down at it and said outside "red on yellow kill a fellow...red on black friend of jack...waaait red yellow!! KILL IT! And I ran away like a sissy! I felt HORRIBLE afterwards. I regret that moment lol. Idk how in the world it got here bc I don't think the poisonus variety are suppose to be here...maybe someone had it as a pet and let it go...crazy people.

I almost got into a physical fight at work last week over a family of geese. They live in the pond by our parking lot and some dumb kid (19ish...dumb kid bc of his actions not his age) I work with was throwing rocks at them when I walked outside! If I didn't need my job so bad I would have thrown rocks at him. I prefer animals much more than most people. Lol

 

[TheWerewolf]

While people get angry that wild critters like skunks, raccoons and groundhogs are in their yards eating at their gardens, i'm waving at them and naming them.

:laughhard: Hahahaha. I can relate to that! So funny! :lol:

others view the attachment to animals as 'freaky' or 'weird', but i see it as people having humanity and compassion.

Yeah, I call it, "having a soul." Those who abuse animals I call, "blackhearted." Sometimes there are the people who are just fine with everything. Pain and emotion roll off their backs like water off a duck's. Those people are hurting, and don't want to trust anything or anyone. I feel sorry for those people. So, I pray for them. One more story. One time there was a groundhog living next to the road and saw it every week when my mother took me to violin practice. After seeing it for two weeks, on the third week something happened. When we were coming home a car sped to it's house. and after it passed I saw a dead groundhog. It was in the road, dead, right next to it's original spot. I got so angry, but couldn't do anything. I have never seen a groundhog again.

I prefer animals much more than most people. Lol

I do too. Animals are easier to work with.

 

[toucan1234]

I know where you guys are coming from.....when i was 12 i had a fish that i watched have a "fish seizure" and die when my parents made me clean his tank to quickly so he wasnt use to it...... i cried for hours over my little Jupiter....so i know what you mean I couldnt imagine losing any of my pets!

 

[BeardieMommy3991]

None of you know me well enough to know, but you'll have to take my word for it when I tell you that I NEVER cry. A few kids from my school died- nothing. Grandparent dies- nothing. Lost fish, hamster, multiple outside caught reptiles and bugs- nothing. But every time I read a story about a beardie who has passed or been abused, or think about my sweet Coconut who passed from cancer, or even think about loosing Toothless, I tear up.

They just give so much blind trust and affection and love you so much. It's like a small child in a scaly body. I will forever be a beardie owner, and It continues to be the only thing I will cry over.

I will be added to the list of animal overly-compassionate people. I refuse to kill any bug I find (except mosquitoes and gnats) and even will name the cockroaches we occasionally get in our house :roll: My parents get so exasperated by it, but I don't see how they can't see the poor defenseless creature in that scaly, hard shelled, or fuzzy body.

 

[athenacp]

I know how you feel, its been over a year and I still cry over Digger, sigh. I want to get another one so bad, but I am losing my job in Sept and am trying to find a new one now so I am hoping I can get another one soon, I miss the snuggles & cuddles!

 

[blue11]

i've TOTALLY done this SO many times.
and as you can see you are NOT alone in it!!! teehee.

it just means you care and love and have compassion and are thankful to be blessed with your beardie ... it stirs up ALL kinds of emotions.
its difficult to get a animal companion b/c its like ... you know you only have so much time with them.
i find myself sometimes obsessing over "x" amount of years i will have them versus the time i DO have with them.
life and death are forced to be reckoned with, and they scare me, i think thats very normal.
i know some of us (guilty here!) think about it more than others, it hits us at odd times of the day, just thinking and what not ....
BUT ... you love Poncho every day and Poncho loves you ... so smile and cry if you have to ... every feeling is totally valid when you love someone or something smile cry laugh scream hop up and down dance like a maniac! ahhhh

it just tugs you inside SO much when you look down at a animal that has truly changed your life in ways no one will ever understand, and that's VERY emotional.
awwww just talking about it gonna make me cry AGAIN! i had a good healthy cry over my new rescue beardie last night. and this morning. :shock: its true, ha!

i think you ROCK for posting this. and im so glad you just decided to share it b/c so many people can relate, and every expirience is so different. :love5: :love5: :love5:
do you have a pic of Poncho? id love to see him i really really would!!!

the journey is incredible ... never forget you are still on the ride of your life. it aint over yet! woooohooooo! :headbang:
im very happy he saved you. and whether you know it or not, youve saved him too, the love is palpable, its real. its fate
~Em

 

[Goonie]

I'm guilty of crying crocodile tears with Pookie too. Like you, he helped me during my years of extreme depression after a really bad divorce. His neck snuggles and chest bed times made me feel loved again and worthy of life. He's my world (next to Zim, of course), and couldn't imagine my life without him.

The attachment extends to my next child, Digi. One day, she wasn't feeling well and I had no idea why. I literally stayed up all night watching and listening for any signs for a mad dash to the ER. Of course, during the few minutes that she fell asleep, I balled like a fool, thinking of all of the worst things that could happen to her.

These emotional attachments are perfectly normal. It simply means that you have a loving heart.
(oh great, now I'm going to cry)

 

[Goonie]

[Moved from General to Beardie Tales]