Freaking out

[Ilovelucy]

Hello everyone. I recently joined this site because I got a new baby beardie and was so looking forward to connecting with others who have the same love for these little guys that I've recently found for myself.

I can't believe my first posting is going to be one so terrible, but I'm so conflicted right now that I thought turning to experienced care givers would be the way to go.

I woke up from a very long, unplanned nap to find that my baby beardie had been killed by one if my cats.

I can't believe how attached I had become to her so quickly. I am just devastated. I really believe there was a connection between her and I from the moment I saw her in the pet store. I purchased her brought her home and then realized.... This isn't the beardie I picked out!!! Yes, I could tell. I drove all the way back to a different town. And although I felt silly saying that I wanted to trade for MY beardie, I did it anyway. And I held all 5 of those other babies and then walked around the store and then came back until, yes! I recognized her again! Not only how she looked but her sweet little personality. I brought her home and have been loving her ever since. We did baths, ate yummy crickets. She would crawl down my leg to explore, get startled, then come running back to my hand. She fell asleep on my chest the the first night home... She crawled up my arm onto my shoulder and found a nice little place to nap cuddled under my shirt. I couldnt believe how quickly we bonded and how much I just loved her. I am so angry and upset right now, I just can't even believe it. I feel awful and terrible, like I let her down! She trusted me and I let this happen to her.
I'm sorry for the sob story, I just don't have anyone to share with that I think would understand. I'll probably hear, we'll just get another one! I don't even feel like I deserve another one! And she can't be replaced anyway.....
Ugh.
Jen

 

[Ilovelucy]

So anyway..... The question I have for you guys is do you think I deserve to have a shot with another beardie baby???

This issue with my cats was kind if a fluke. I have a hamster guinea pig adult beardie and two fish, all of which the cats are very interested in. The cats sleep in my room at night and also when I'm at work. They only come out when I'm home so I can watch them around the other animals!!

My mom was over the other day and we were in my room, I was snuggling my baby. I started getting drowsy so my mom took my baby to put her away and I passed out cold. When I woke up I ran to her cage, saw that the top was left open and the cats were left roaming around.... Ugh. Granted I should still not have let it happen, but I'm not so negligent that I just let this sort of thing happen all the time. I really try to be on top of this sort of thing which is why it is so heartbreaking. I DO think about these things, I DO try to protect against it. This was just such an unusual situation because I had worked an overnight shift, was exhausted, my mom out beardie away, etc. none of these things are the norm....
Anyway, I just have too big of a conscience to just run out and get a new one. I don't see these guys as disposable pets and this is a big deal to me. I just want some feedback because I don't know any other pet owners. Should I get a new one? Should I forget about it? Has anything like this happened to anyone else before?

I don't think I'm a bad pet owner, I have researched my adult beardie like crazy, always coming to this site to find out what's going on. When he was brumating, when he started shedding.... I have all proper supples and lighting and feeders etc.

I guess what I want is someone to tell me that it's ok and these things happen and hopefully I learned something and that I can have another lol!!! Maybe that won't happen though and I could be ok with that. I care more about taking good care than my own want for another baby. So please, any honest feedback is appreciated!! Thank you and sorry this is such an odd post :/ I'm very new to pets and want to learn as much as I can.
Thank you!!!
Jen

 

[AHBD]

Hi Jen....I'm really sorry to hear about this tragedy ! I'll start off by saying that you sound like a very responsible and loving pet owner, and sad to say, accidents happen to all of us. A while back a poster was devastated because she fell asleep with her beardie, rolled on it + killed it ! She was soooo remorseful ! So I think you should not judge yourself as unworthy of having another....just be super careful of these types of situations. So go find another baby and take extra care around the cats, or whenever the beardie is out and not to fall asleep with the baby, for more reasons than one it can be dangerous. Another thing to be aware of is that babies [ even very mellow ones ] often jump from you when you don't expect it, causing injury....so don't walk around with him/her on your shoulder. So there are a few tips....Hopefully your next post will be a happy one.

 

[TracyLee]

Can't really make you feel better but I do understand. I had three leopard geckos that I rescued. I have cats, ferrets and a dog. The lid I had on their tank was enough to keep the cats out but the ferrets could get it open so I never left the ferrets out unattended. Well one night I had just let the ferrets out to play and my mom called me needing to go to the hospital right away. I didn't even think about the ferrets being out running loose. When I got home 6 hours later it was a disaster. At first all I found was blood and tails. My ferrets had gotten into the tank and caused chaos. I never did find the body of the baby. I felt (and still feel) sooo guilty because it was preventable. It wasn't their fault, it was mine. I took on the responsibility of giving them better lives and better homes and I failed. But I also learned. I made a new better lid that the ferrets cannot get around. I don't let the ferrets out if I'm the only one home. I don't let the ferrets climb to the top of their cage anymore at all (I keep the lizard cage up there) and I keep a close eye on everything when they are out.

I went and got a baby beardie a week later. I had buried what was left of my Leo's and grieved for them. I sanatized everything and made sure I was ready before I got my new baby. It's hard and yes some times **** just happens. We do our best and things still slip thru the cracks. I'm sorry you lost your baby. I do know how hard it is. Give yourself time if you need it and when you're ready if you still want another go get one. Find a way to secure your tank top. That might mean upgrading tanks or having one custom made.

 

[Ilovelucy]

thank you so so much for the kind words. it really helped during this grieving process. i have been taking it so much harder than i thought i would, being as i only had her for a few days! :shock: but i just loved that little baby so much.... and like i said, it was an instant connection from the start, very special....