What to do with those pesky salads

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If that silly Mom insists on continuing to perplex you with useless salads, there are a few things you can do to show your disapproval of the offending vegetation.Under NO circumstances should you eat a single bit, however you can make the best of a bad situation by interacting with the salad so that she knows yes, you've seen it, and no, you do not approve. Start by giving the salad the stink eye, that'll show it who's boss.
Make sure mom can see that you are expressing your displeasure; make that eye REALLY stinky
Once you've tried the stare-down, if the salad refuses to cease existing, you'll have to physically engage. Try to flatten the greenery that mom shredded, chopped and de-seeded with love. Climb right in and really smash it; don't be afraid to rub your hind-quarters all over each bit. You want to make sure your message gets across.
If being in contact with the salad proves stressful, you may want to take the opportunity to use the bed of shredded squash, apple, greens, bok choy and bell pepper to practice your yoga. That cobra pose isn't going to perfect itself!
Try to look over at mom sternly every few minutes too. She needs to see what she's putting you through.
Mom may try to trick you into eating the salad by mixing your noms in with it, but DON'T BE FOOLED.
Nice try mom, I wasn't born last night!
Simply throw the salad out, and eat the noms. Mom can clean your tank while she thinks about what she's done.
If mom continues, protest your mistreatment by shedding your skin everywhere, and then eating it. This will show her that you'd rather eat your own dry scales than the butternut squash and de-seeded strawberry that she grated finely just for you. Try to look as haggard and ratchet as possible while you're eating your own skin, maybe mom will take pity and cease the veggie assault.
If mom tirelessly presents you with worthless salad, you may be tempted into just giving in... but you MUST continue to resist. YOU ARE THE RULER OF YOUR KINGDOM!
You preside over 5 basking surfaces, you do NOT have to lower your standards to the likes of salad.
Mom may try to soften you up by giving you cuddles and rocking you to sleep like the precious baby you are,
but she can't make you eat the salad, and she knows it. Stand tall, and remember, every time mom puts a salad in, assertively walk right over to it, and let her know that you've got nothing but time to NOT eat it.
After all, she's going to love you anyway, because how could she not?


BD.org Sicko
Retired Moderator
:lol: That was awesome, you sure summed it all up exactly. Thanks for the truths and the laughs. :mrgreen:

Your beardie is adorable and says a LOT with his facial expressions. :)


BD.org Sicko
Ha ha ha ha ha ! :lol: That is hilarious ! The only thing she has left to do is toss, fling and body slam it.


Juvie Member
Oh my gosh thank you for the laugh this morning! Is your little girl a Dunner? SO cute! My Thaney will eat about 2-3 pieces of salad before starting this process. She ALWAYS sits on the greens as if to say "this is what I think of your efforts, Mom."

Here is a rare sighting of her actually eating the greens, but she is obviously still too good for the bowl.



Juvie Member
So true.

Kirby reminds all other beardies not to forget taking a big poo in the salad. No need to mess up your tank when the salad bowl will be taken away quickly once you poo in it. Silly humans. They never learn do they


Gray-bearded Member
:laughhard: :laughhard: :laughhard: This is just too funny. Thankfully, my little dude is a pig who will eat ANYTHING :lol:


Juvie Member
"How dare you make me a beautiful salad, Mom!"
*runs off in protest while giving an extra-stinky stink eye*



Gray-bearded Member
I'm not going to let my beardie read this. Don't want to give him any extra ideas.
:lol: :laughhard: :laughhard:


Hatchling Member
Death to your silly salads!! Haha. Super cute. Definitely sums up Thomas' feeling about salad. (Unless you're not watching, of course... :twisted: )


Juvie Member
*wakes up to the sound of Thane crunching leftover greens*

Good... good... come to the dark side! Muahahaha!!!!
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So to any reading this, how on earth do I post a thread 😅 New here, possibly too old for this

Just Hazel in a filter I need so not posting on forums.
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So he’s gotten bubbles on his eye. We wiped them off and it’s only been twice in the last few weeks. Should we be concerned? No coughing or congestion. He’s very hungry and sleeps well. He’s 8-9 month range. His humidity is 30-40 day time and as high as 50-55 at night to early morning.
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