Sorry i didnt give a better explination, i was so distraught and had a panic attack in the icu and had taken an entire 2mg xanax so i was out if it, to say the least.
They said his heart disease was pretty extensive, that hes must have had it for a good while, but never showed any symptoms. He did make it through the night and didn't look as bad as the vet made it seem. He didn't look any worse than he did a week ago and the vet originally said he wouldn't make it long enough for us to get there and we should consider putting him down. But I refuse to be the one to make that call. We got here and he looked like last Thursday and when i pet him, I leaned over to kiss him and talk to him, told him it was okay, if he was hurting, then it was okay for him to go and then he sorta pulled himself forward (Like the low belly crawling thing they do sometimes) lifted his head kinda high up, and opened his eyes kinda wide for a second but it may have just been part of the passing process.
He pulled through the night and we got here this morning and he isn't any different. He's doing these occasional gasping (no actual sound thank god) things, which is also very hard. The vet said he isn't in any excruciating pain and that they have a tendency to linger for a long time but hes very unlikely to make any kind of turn around and putting him to sleep is the kind choice now. So, that's probably what we will do and have him cremated.
**update** we made that choice. It was hard, but he had zero quality of life and it was like he was in a coma. She gave us a paw print and we are having him cremated and I'm getting a nice shadowbox for his harness, the urn, and his favorite pillow and a photo. Something inside me died with him today. I was wanting a new tattoo for my birthday on Tuesday and I was gonna get something from the video game the last of us, but im going to get something for Toothless. Paw prints or something. For my boy, the bestest boy.