Feeling discouraged - baby beardie

So we've had our little guy for about a week and a half now. I'd say by his length he is going on 4 months. I've been trying different things to help him not be stressed in his new space, but I'm starting to get discouraged.
He has all the proper lighting and temps, he has a hideaway, his tank is 40 gallons but has enough stuff in it that it really open. Talking to a local pet store they think that the big chain store we bought him from may have handled him improperly and that's why he is so skittish.
When we first got him he hid all day so I took his hideaway out so he would start basking. It turned out I had his lights a little too close so when I moved them that got better and now I see him gaping and basking often.
He will eat a waxworm out of my hand, and I've had him take mealworms (though they creep me out to hold). He isn't too bad with my hand in the tank, but the problem is when I try to handle him. I always try and go from the front or side, and I take it slow. I'll put my hand in, wait a moment, then move a little closer and so on. He will watch me until I get close enough to pet him then he runs away and paws at the glass to escape!
One person who owns beardies suggested feeding him outside his tank so he associates my hand with something good, so I got a small tub with high walls to feed him his crickets in. The first time he ate fine, but every other time he just gets so freaked out he doesn't eat anything. I know his appetite is low at the moment as he is currently shedding, but I'm afraid he won't eat enough.
I'm also worried about his hydration and want to give him baths, but he gets so stressed that he doesn't enjoy them even with the right water temps (side note: I do spray his veggies with water and I bought an electrolyte for lizards that I put on them to help with hydration).
He also has a lot of energy in his tank. Like he will be basking and seem totally fine, minimal stress marks, and all of a sudden he takes a leap at the back wall. Or he will randomly climb down from the rock and start pawing at the glass. If I go over and sit beside him he stops for a second, but I think it's just because he's afraid I might pick him up. He even seems like he's starting to be afraid of my voice! I've read a lot of other peoples posts about these situations and everyone seems to say the same thing: it just takes time and patients. But I'm just feeling discouraged and worried he will never come around. I don't want to go back to feeding him in the cage because the crickets are easier to manage in another container. I am thinking of trying a smaller tank instead of the tub because I think part of his stress is he can't see out. I also read that he might be pawing at the glass because he wants out to explore. But anytime he's been out and gets out of my hand he runs right up to the tank and paws to get back in! Any words of encouragement would be awesome, I just want our little baby to be happy. (Sorry my post is a little all over the place)

It's going to take awhile- he's going thru relocation stress- I would give him time to settle in before all the handling- putting your hand in the tank feeding by hand is good- you need to be feeding him salads every morning you can wash them before serving- add some super worms on top 1-3 to entice him to the glass bowl-- you onneed him eating some veggies now - I can help more w/ websites for insects worms
Karrie

So first off please post your setup with pictures. Everyone is going to ask for that just to rule out husbandry.

Please do not feed meal worms to babies. Their shell is hard for them digest and can cause impaction. They can have supers when they are older.

You’ve only had him a week? I fear the changes in his tank/you trying to handle him so soon is stressing him out even more. They all go through relocation stress, it is best not to handle them during this time if they don’t want to be handled. What’s more is you’ve removed/changed decor, which is also stressful for a baby trying to get used to his new surroundings. They really don’t need baths unless they are dirty. They usually get all the hydration needed from greens/bugs. If worried about it you can drip some water on his nose and see if he drinks. While placing them in a feeding tub can be easier, it can also be stressful for them. I tired this method when mine was a baby but he was too stressed from being in a separate container and would not eat. What I found to work is I bought a escape proof dish, and put his dubias in there.
Give him some time to acclimate to his new environment without changing anything in his tank. He will become comfortable in it eventually. Sometimes it takes and few weeks for them to feel secure. Once he’s over the relocation stress then you can start with the handling.
Relax. It’s only been a week. It can take months for them to become completely comfortable with you depending on the dragon. Keep stress to a minimum by skipping baths, finding a feeding routine that works for you and the baby, and not changing his tank around until he is comfortable.

KarrieRee":3s68wi7a said:

It's going to take awhile- he's going thru relocation stress- I would give him time to settle in before all the handling- putting your hand in the tank feeding by hand is good- you need to be feeding him salads every morning you can wash them before serving- add some super worms on top 1-3 to entice him to the glass bowl-- you onneed him eating some veggies now - I can help more w/ websites for insects worms
Karrie

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Yes I do feed him a good variety of veggies every day. Like I said I spray them with water to help him get hydrated. I give him crickets and mealworms. The odd waxwork for a treat. I also bought butterworms but havent tried them yet

A week and a half is nothing. These animals are individuals with individual (different) personalities, temperaments and idiosyncrasies, and can come with individual baggage. Taming can take weeks to months, depending on the individual.

Also consider their size and rank in the food chain. When they're little, everything spooks them; their only natural defense is fear/running away. Later, like a cat, it's making themselves look big & scary... then running away.

BDs are also pretty low on the food chain; the only things lower are the bugs/prey they eat. Almost everything else in their natural habitat is trying to eat them. They're also very fecund (reproduce profusely) like rodents, who are also primarily prey for other animals.

So their first instinct is that the "giant hand" (which they may or may not yet associate with the "giant head" is going to EAT them. Instinct is very difficult to overcome, especially with such a limited capacity for reason.

I've had mine since Nov., and he's still skittish, but getting better in recent days. (At least yours doesn't hiss & bite whenever you come near him. :roll: )

One thing you can try is wearing a clean unscented (no fabric softeners, etc.) handkerchief against the skin of your chest (or wherever you eventually want him to snuggle) for a few days to a week, then put it (unwashed) in the enclosure so he gets used to your scent. If he chooses to sleep on/near it, GREAT! If not, don't force it--he'll still get used to your... aura. :wink: :lol:

Another thing is, once you attempt to pick him up, don't let him dissuade you with his skittishness. That will reinforce his behavior--it'll teach him that if he runs away, you'll eventually give up. Follow through, and teach him that, while he may be slightly inconvenienced, you're not someone/something to fear, and he will eventually resign himself to allowing you to pick him up--especially if it results in something good, like food, cuddles, freedom, etc.

There was a final thing, but I must be having a senior moment--it escaped me.

EDIT: OH! (Got it!) Finally, don't telegraph your frustration, impatience, or any other negatives (fear, doubt, uncertainty) to your dragon. Most animals are much more perceptive than humans (a trade-off/price we pay for verbal communication). If there's even a possibility that he'll pick up on any kind of negativity, it could delay his taming. Be happy, confident, yet gentle at all times when interacting, and he should tame up just fine.

At the risk of a hackneyed cliché, Rome wasn't built in a day. It's still going to take some time. Hang in there. :wink:

Thank you Mr Spectrum, I will try the clothing thing for sure. And yes I am very lucky he doesnt get aggressive!

Remember, we're giant, scary, probably-predator things to them, and if the chain store people didn't handle them much, there's going to be that + the relocation stress to deal with. I don't have anything to add to others' suggestions, but just be kind & patient, and you'll soon have a little snuggle machine on your hands