It sounds like you've been through some real hell.
Interestingly, I was also in my late 20s when I was first diagnosed with "depression" -- a long time ago. I'm 60 now, but I remember a lot of it maybe a little too clearly. Some hard times that I wouldn't want to go through again. Maybe it was a miracle that I lasted in the work force for as long as I did -- 17 years full time, but I burned out and had to quit two different jobs. The second time I never recovered, but by then I was lucky enough to have married the love of my life in the meantime, and he was willing to be the sole breadwinner for both of us, although it took him a while to get his career off the ground. I'd been telling people that we have an old-fashioned marriage -- it's his job to bring home the "bacon" and my job to cook it, but lately I'm not even up to cooking most of the time, so he's eating out of cans and out of the freezer, but he still appreciates every little thing I'm able to do and doesn't complain about it. :love5:
My nephew (who has ADD) used to have tantrums (my sister called them "meltdowns") and he also had so much energy that he'd get bored and have "bad thoughts" if he didn't always have something interesting to do. He's in his 30's now, married with 5 kids, and apparently doing pretty well. I suppose his family keeps him plenty busy, although I think I'd probably go nuts with that many human children bouncing around in my house. Talk about sensory overload...
Your beardies are better off with phoenix worms and silk worms anyway. The only really nice things about superworms is that they tend to be cheaper, they're really easy to take care of, and they have a fairly long "shelf life" compared to most other live feeders. That's probably what makes them so tempting for the human slaves even though they're not the best thing for the bearded dragons, even though most beardies like them a little too much.
I'm planning to see if I can get some of that "Repashy Grub Pie" that people talk about around here and see if our beardie likes it, since he doesn't seem to recognize the kibbles as food. I worry about the possibility of not being able to get live bugs for a while (in case we get snowed in, etc) and it would be nice to have something to keep around to feed him just in case the usual stuff wasn't available. As I understand, this is a powder that you make into a gel for insectivores, so it probably has a fairly decent shelf life, unlike the live bugs. The other nice thing about it if I can get it and if he'll eat it is that the gel would have more moisture content than the dry pellets so I presume it would be better for
hydration. I'm not sure if any of the local stores carry it around here so I may have to order it online, but we're planning for my husband to do the run to the pet store for roaches tonight if he gets home from work on time, so we'll get a chance to see if they carry it there. That would save us having to pay twice what it's worth for shipping to Alaska. :roll:
Well, Puff has knocked his thermometer halfway off his basking platform a-g-a-i-n. I'm starting to wonder if he does it on purpose because he likes it hotter than I think it should be, and he doesn't want me to know... :wink: He's all pancaked out leaning on it halfway, happy warm color with his eyes at half mast, looking quite contented and pleased with himself.