PLEASE HELP! NEW OWNER IN NEED OF SERIOUS ADVICE!

NoelBaby503 · Apr 24, 2017

We just got a bearded dragon from a customer of my husbands. They just gave him to us. My husband has owned them in the past, but after reading some discussions on here, im starting to think he isnt as knowledgable as i thought he was. We went to petco lastnight and bought the walnut bedding? we also got some large crickets and mealworms, which we fed to him on the walnut?? do you think he will be okay since it was just 1 time? I will be removing the walnut bedding as soon as the dragon wakes up. They gave us a cage for him too, which has tile/slate looking floor. They are removeable, which i see a lot of owners on here believe that is good for them. The tank has a black coil looking bulb that gives off heat, so if its the same bulb ive been reading about on here, its bad?!? its mounted to the side of the wall inside the enclosure, and we put his log under it so he can climb up and sit under it. Theres also an under cabinet light in there. Not sure which bulb is in there, ill be looking into that later today when he wakes up. Ive been reading mixed info on the ideal temperatures. There is a temperature strip on the side where the black bulb is, and a round dial type thermometer on the other side.. what is the ideal temperatures for hot side and cold side, and night and day time? I have everything in his cage off right now, since its night, which is what my husband said to do. I have a gun thermometer its about 75 in there right now.. He is sleeping on his log right now though and has black stripes. Is it safe to leave the heat bulb running all night? I uploaded pics of him earlier with his light on, and one with the flash since his light was off, that was taken a few minutes ago. Im wondering if the dark color is normal. Im not even sure if he is actually a he, or how to tell. He is pretty big though, which is another thing i wanted to upload the picture for, to see if anyone could give a rough estimate of his age. I also added pictures of the bulb and his cage so i could get some advice. Also, are the food and water bowls ok?

I'm guessing that lettuce my husband put in there is no good for him? ?Sorry for the long post, i am just worried about him now because of the walnuts and reading about the bulbs and stuff. He is an awesome dragon! He is soo super sweet and chill and i want to give him the best. I feel like a failure already, especially since i was confident that my husband knew what he was doing?im worried about the dragon can someone please give me some advice before i worry myself to death!!???

The last image is him sleeping right now. The color worries me. Is he too cold? ?

AHBD · Apr 24, 2017

Hi there, I'm on my way out but others will help you. He does look healthy first glance, that's good. One thing to do ASAP, remove the black ceramic heater, he may easily leap on to it + get burned ! Find a good white heat bulb and mount it so he can't jump on it. So, I've gotta run....more people will chime in ! He looks good !

NoelBaby503 · Apr 24, 2017

I was going to ask about that, because right now he is playing in there and his tail is up as he runs around. Almost touched the light!!???

Gormagon · Apr 24, 2017

That black ceramic heat emitter does need to be moved but moved to overhead so he can not touch it. It should only be used if your temps in the hours drop below 65° at night. They like it cool and dark so the can actually rest, any type of light emitting heat source disturbs their sleep patterns.
Move both fixtures overhead use one for a basking light and the other for the heat emitter.
On to the under cabinet light...
Remove the cover and load it with a replacement bulb, use a Reptisun 10.0 uvb bulb. If the bulbs in it are 5/8 inches it is a t5 but it is most likely a t8 which is (I believe) 7/8. Do not put the cover back on, it blocks 100% of uvb rays.

Neuro · Apr 24, 2017

I just wanted to add to what everyone else has told you. I am a fairly new beardie owner as well and have learned a lot here. Someone feel free to correct me if I get anything wrong. The dark colors when they are cold is completely normal, you will also see him turn darker when he is under his lights if he is cold, this helps them to absorb more heat.

As long as it is not dropping below 65 degrees at night he should be fine. Stick to your IR Temp Gun or a Probe type thermometer. The temp strips and round type stick on type thermometers are known to be widely inaccurate. Sometimes off by as much as 20 degrees.

And yes, ditch the lettuce.. all water and no real nutition and can make for messy poos. Stick to Dandelion Greens/Mustard Greens or Collard Greens along with a variety of other beardie approved vegetables. Also, ditch the mealworms ... while he looks to be old enough to eat them and not have a problem with impaction there are far better feeders out there and mealworms are not worth the risk in my opinion. Stick to Dubia Roaches if you can, excellent feeder and very low fat to protien ratio. I actually order them on Amazon and have them shipped to my house. I cannot find them locally, but they ship well and I have never had an issue. It is also very easy to start your own colony if you don't want to be paying for feeders.

Definitely listen to the others regarding the lights fixtures/heat emitters. Looking at the pictures and how close that is to him scares me. I decided to touch mine last night that was on a very LOW setting on a dimmer switch to make sure it was on...(derp) and it burned the crap out of me.

I keep my basking spot around 105 degrees and cool side at 85 degrees. Others may have a different opinion on that.

Welcome to the life of a Beardie Slave. I am sure others will weigh in with more advice and correct anything I may be wrong on.

--Craig

eziowestbrook · Apr 24, 2017

First and foremost, do you have both heat lightbulbs and UVB? UVB is absolutely necessary. It should be on 12 hours at a time while he's in his cage--it acts as sunlight for reptiles.

What size cage do you have in gallons?

In his basking spot, it should be at a highest temperature of 115°F. 130°F is okay for about 30 minutes at a time but NEVER constant. It's too hot and will make them sick. The cool side during the day should be at a high of 85° and a low of 65°. Never ever get below 65°, day or night. Temperature drop during night hours is good for beardies and promotes a better sleep, so it's just as important as his home being warm during the day.

Also, UVB should be turned off at night or else he won't be able to sleep.

kingofnobbys · Apr 24, 2017

eziowestbrook":3n1t9e2s said:
First and foremost, do you have both heat lightbulbs and UVB? UVB is absolutely necessary. It should be on 12 hours at a time while he's in his cage--it acts as sunlight for reptiles. <<<< 12 hours is more like winter in their natural range, I'd bump the day cycle up to at least 15 hours per day (I have all my lights on a powerboard and household digital programmable timer to come on at 6am and go off at 10pm).

What size cage do you have in gallons? <<<<< If he's an adult , even a big juvenile (subadult) over 18 months old I would make arrangements to set him up in his forever home , 4ft x 2ft x 2ft is standard for one adult bearded dragon here in Australia.

In his basking spot, it should be at a highest temperature of 115°F. 130°F is okay for about 30 minutes at a time but NEVER constant. <<<< 130oF IS WAY TOO HOT, NEVER EVER LET YOU BEARDIE BE EXPOSED TO THAT MUCH HEAT - is OK for monitors BUT NOT for beardies.
Adult beardies (over 2 years old , and I think juveniles over 16 months) like it a bit cooler than hatchlings , so my beardies have basking spots run at 38-40oCelsius , and I keep the warmer than 24oC overnight too.

It's too hot and will make them sick. The cool side during the day should be at a high of 85° and a low of 65°. Never ever get below 65°, day or night. Temperature drop during night hours is good for beardies and promotes a better sleep, so it's just as important as his home being warm during the day.

Also, UVB should be turned off at night or else he won't be able to sleep.

kingofnobbys · Apr 24, 2017

NoelBaby503":2gy5dws7 said:
We just got a bearded dragon from a customer of my husbands. They just gave him to us. My husband has owned them in the past, but after reading some discussions on here, im starting to think he isnt as knowledgable as i thought he was. We went to petco lastnight and bought the walnut bedding? we also got some large crickets and mealworms, which we fed to him on the walnut?? <<<< ditch the walnut bedding ---- best place for that is on the garden as mulch , it's lethal to beardies if they happen to accidentially eat as it cause a fatal impaction if they can not pass it with their poo.
For adults many here use dried screened PLAYSAND .... personally I wouldn't risk it.
Your best bedding for a beardie is one or a mixture of the following ":
lino
loosely laid ceramic floor or wall tiles (NO glue or grout)
loosely laid slate tiles
loosely laid sandstone pavers
kitchen grade absorbant paper toweling

'
mealworms are OK for him as he's a big boy and can handle them , BUT as a treat only, maybe 4 at a time , they love the pupae and beetles too.

do you think he will be okay since it was just 1 time? I will be removing the walnut bedding as soon as the dragon wakes up. They gave us a cage for him too, which has tile/slate looking floor.<<< keep the slate stuff , it's fine as his bedding. They are removeable, which i see a lot of owners on here believe that is good for them. The tank has a black coil looking bulb that gives off heat, so if its the same bulb ive been reading about on here, its bad?!? its mounted to the side of the wall inside the enclosure, and we put his log under it so he can climb up and sit under it. Theres also an under cabinet light in there. Not sure which bulb is in there, ill be looking into that later today when he wakes up. Ive been reading mixed info on the ideal temperatures. There is a temperature strip on the side where the black bulb is, and a round dial type thermometer on the other side.. what is the ideal temperatures for hot side and cold side, and night and day time? I have everything in his cage off right now, since its night, which is what my husband said to do. I have a gun thermometer its about 75 in there right now.. He is sleeping on his log right now though and has black stripes. Is it safe to leave the heat bulb running all night? I uploaded pics of him earlier with his light on, and one with the flash since his light was off, that was taken a few minutes ago. Im wondering if the dark color is normal. Im not even sure if he is actually a he, or how to tell. He is pretty big though, which is another thing i wanted to upload the picture for, to see if anyone could give a rough estimate of his age. I also added pictures of the bulb and his cage so i could get some advice. Also, are the food and water bowls ok?

I'm guessing that lettuce my husband put in there is no good for him? ?Sorry for the long post, i am just worried about him now because of the walnuts and reading about the bulbs and stuff. He is an awesome dragon! He is soo super sweet and chill and i want to give him the best. I feel like a failure already, especially since i was confident that my husband knew what he was doing?im worried about the dragon can someone please give me some advice before i worry myself to death!!???

<<< he's a dead ringer for my recently passed girl Rex .... seeing the picture brought tears to my eyes .... looks just like she did when she was enjoying her sunny window or basking under her UVB200 and 80W par38 bulb, or having a lovely mommy or daddy snuggle (except she'd be glowing and showing her happy colours when having mommy or daddy snuggles.
When they are cold they go a bit darker than that..he's got the pancake thing going nicely there ....
The last image is him sleeping right now. The color worries me. Is he too cold? ?

I agree with others' recommendation regarding the CHE and the cabinet light . Make sure the tube in it is rated AT LEAST 10% UVB.

I'd invest in a set of digital thermometers and get temperatures at a glace from strategic spots (warm zone, cool zone, basking spot, under hide say) , I use these and have found they are very good and accurate within 1oC - 3 per lizard tank.
http://www.ebay.com.au/itm/4x-LCD-Digital-Temperature-Thermometer-Fridge-Freezer-Aquarium-Fish-Tank-Reptile-/391259141696?hash=item5b18dcb640:g

Also recommend you set up a thermostat with a remote probe (in his usually sleeping spot say) to control the CHE , essentially, set it's temperature and leave it running 24/7 . The basking globe will warm up the tank during the day, and the thermostat will simply turn off the CHE unless it's a REALLY COLD DAY.
I use this kind of thermostat and have found them very reliable
http://www.ebay.com.au/itm/New-Thermostat-Digital-For-Reptile-Lizard-Snake-Heat-Mat-Lamp-Incubator-Aquarium-/251930630349?hash=item3aa83c58cd:g

kingofnobbys · Apr 24, 2017

AHBD":1p9fyvet said:
Hi there, I'm on my way out but others will help you. He does look healthy first glance, that's good. One thing to do ASAP, remove the black ceramic heater, he may easily leap on to it + get burned ! Find a good white heat bulb and mount it so he can't jump on it. So, I've gotta run....more people will chime in ! He looks good !

'
Either that or buy a wire cage to fit over it, this will stop him from making direct contact with the CHE or the ceramic fitting's very hot surfaces ie
http://www.ebay.com.au/itm/Reptile-Mesh-Light-Cage-Protector-Round-Extra-Small-120mm-round-x-160mm-long-/322330831349?hash=item4b0c6a29f5:g

These are good for MVBs and other incandescent and halogen basking globes too , for same reason.

Beardies are very inquisitive and will tend to touch lights and fixtures if they can reach them , even if they have tripod (tail and back legs) to stand up to do so .

NoelBaby503 · Apr 25, 2017

First, i want to thank everyone for the great advice! I did remove the walnut bedding. I removed the ceramic bulb, and replaced it with a 13w exo terra reptile uvb 150 desert bulb. It is a coil bulb. The cage size is 4 feet long, and 2 feet wide, and about about an inch shy of 2 feet tall, is this a good bulb? Is it too strong, too weak, or just right? I dont want him getting blinded or burnt!! If this bulb is not acceptable, what is the maximum amount of days i can use it? I cant afford the repti sun right now. Im guessing the uvb that i got is better for him than what was in there already, YOU GUYS WONT BELIEVE WHAT THE PREVIOUS OWNERS HAD IN THE LIGHT BALLAST,

REGULAR FLOURESCENT HOUSE BULBS. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW HE IS ALIVE! He had no uvb and only the ceramic bulb, that was it!!! ? Oh and i re-positioned the socket that now has the exo terra uvb so he cant reach it!? Here is a pic of the uvb bulb and measurement so you can see the how high it is from the ground

On the other end of the cage there was an empty socket, so i bought an exo terra 50w intense basking spot (+75 intense) small bulb and put it in there with a metal shield refelctor dome.

Here are some pics of it and also a measurement of how high it is from the ground.

Is this a good bulb? I am probably going to have to head back to petco to get a stronger bulb for the basking spot, because my infrared gun was reading around 95° right under the basking light? not hot enough right? I plan on getting the reptisun 10.0 24" uvb tube light for the ballast when i have the funds. With his cage being 4ft long 2ft wide, and an inch shy of 2 feet tall, will a 24" be too strong of a uvb for his cage? The ballast that i will be putting the repti sun in covers about 3/4 of the cage. I am not going to use the ballast until i get the repti sun bulb. Should i just get 1 24"? Or 2 of them? The ballast can hold 2 bulbs, but it works with just 1 as well. New pictures of his setup now. LEFT SIDE

RIGHT SIDE

If you guys could answer me those questions and give advice/suggestions that would be GREATLY APPRECIATED!!❤❤ SIDE NOTE: Today was AWESOME! Its only the second day we have had the dragon and we totally bonded today. He was laying on my tummy while i was on my bed, and he was just staring at me checking me out (as he is still getting use to me i assume) and then he crawled off and crawled to my armpit and nestled in and went to sleep??

I shared my blakets with him and we cuddled for a while before my husband moved him back to his cage, which mind you he DID NOT WAKE UP AT ALL!! These creatures sleep through anything!! ?? Does the fact that he nestled up to me show a sign of trust? ❤ One last question, is it safe to give him a baby blanket to sleep with? We did tonight.

pictures of the snuggle session just for fun. ? I will be heading back to petco tomorrow, so a timely reply with bulb suggestions/info would be soo awesome! THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH, and i look forward to hearing back from you!!?❤

kingofnobbys · Apr 25, 2017

NoelBaby503":12pbblnd said:
First, i want to thank everyone for the great advice! I did remove the walnut bedding. I removed the ceramic bulb, and replaced it with a 13w exo terra reptile uvb 150 desert bulb. It is a coil bulb. The cage size is 4 feet long, and 2 feet wide, and about about an inch shy of 2 feet tall, is this a good bulb? Is it too strong, too weak, or just right? I dont want him getting blinded or burnt!! If this bulb is not acceptable, what is the maximum amount of days i can use it? I cant afford the repti sun right now. Im guessing the uvb that i got is better for him than what was in there already, YOU GUYS WONT BELIEVE WHAT THE PREVIOUS OWNERS HAD IN THE LIGHT BALLAST,

REGULAR FLOURESCENT HOUSE BULBS. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW HE IS ALIVE! He had no uvb and only the ceramic bulb, that was it!!! ? Oh and i re-positioned the socket that now has the exo terra uvb so he cant reach it!? Here is a pic of the uvb bulb and measurement so you can see the how high it is from the ground

On the other end of the cage there was an empty socket, so i bought an exo terra 50w intense basking spot (+75 intense) small bulb and put it in there with a metal shield refelctor dome.

Here are some pics of it and also a measurement of how high it is from the ground.

Is this a good bulb? I am probably going to have to head back to petco to get a stronger bulb for the basking spot, because my infrared gun was reading around 95° right under the basking light? not hot enough right? I plan on getting the reptisun 10.0 24" uvb tube light for the ballast when i have the funds. With his cage being 4ft long 2ft wide, and an inch shy of 2 feet tall, will a 24" be too strong of a uvb for his cage? The ballast that i will be putting the repti sun in covers about 3/4 of the cage. I am not going to use the ballast until i get the repti sun bulb. Should i just get 1 24"? Or 2 of them? The ballast can hold 2 bulbs, but it works with just 1 as well. New pictures of his setup now. LEFT SIDE

RIGHT SIDE

If you guys could answer me those questions and give advice/suggestions that would be GREATLY APPRECIATED!!❤❤ SIDE NOTE: Today was AWESOME! Its only the second day we have had the dragon and we totally bonded today. He was laying on my tummy while i was on my bed, and he was just staring at me checking me out (as he is still getting use to me i assume) and then he crawled off and crawled to my armpit and nestled in and went to sleep??

I shared my blakets with him and we cuddled for a while before my husband moved him back to his cage, which mind you he DID NOT WAKE UP AT ALL!! These creatures sleep through anything!! ?? Does the fact that he nestled up to me show a sign of trust? ❤ One last question, is it safe to give him a baby blanket to sleep with? We did tonight.

pictures of the snuggle session just for fun. ? I will be heading back to petco tomorrow, so a timely reply with bulb suggestions/info would be soo awesome! THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH, and i look forward to hearing back from you!!?❤

A 26W UVB200 will be much better as the UVB150 is only rated at 5% UVB. He'll get very little UVA and UVB from a 13W UVB150 at 10 inches , but will be good with a 26W UVB200 , even better if you put a dome reflector around it and aim it at the basking spot. ie the dome from one of these http://www.thatpetplace.com/black-heat-light-reflector-dome-with-ceramic-socket

A better option still is a Zoo Med OS-24 T8 UVB10.0 24" 17W tube inplace of the GE tube you show which emits virtually zero UVA and zero UVB , whereas the Zoo Med 17W 24" T8 UVB10.0 is rated to produce 10% UVB and about 30% UVB and in your tank will give beardie better UVA and UVB over more of the tank.
see http://www.uvguide.co.uk/phototherapyphosphor-tests.htm

An Arcadia 12%UVB T8 will be even better http://www.arcadia-reptile.com/fluorescent-lamps/t8-d3plus-desert/
Either the Zoo Med 10%UVB T8 or Arcadia 12%UVB T8 will be much better for your beardie with a reflector like this slipped behind the tube http://arcadia-reptile.com/fluorescent-lamp-reflectors-t5t8/
see this report for how a reflector helps by near doubling the UVA and UVB seen by the lizard
http://www.uvguide.co.uk/fluorescenttubereflectortests.htm

I use 26W UVB200s in all my tanks (4ftx2ftx1.5ft) and 100L raring tubs , but will be upgrading to Arcadia 24W 24" T5 12%UVB tubes when I build Peppa and Toothless big new homes (Rex's and Puff's tanks being old and dilapidated and a bit of rough DIYS job (by your's truly several years ago) and in storage in my shed now.

NoelBaby503 · Apr 25, 2017

kingofnobbys said:
NoelBaby503 said:

We just got a bearded dragon from a customer of my husbands. They just gave him to us. My husband has owned them in the past, but after reading some discussions on here, im starting to think he isnt as knowledgable as i thought he was. We went to petco lastnight and bought the walnut bedding? we also got some large crickets and mealworms, which we fed to him on the walnut?? <<<< ditch the walnut bedding ---- best place for that is on the garden as mulch , it's lethal to beardies if they happen to accidentially eat as it cause a fatal impaction if they can not pass it with their poo.
For adults many here use dried screened PLAYSAND .... personally I wouldn't risk it.
Your best bedding for a beardie is one or a mixture of the following ":
lino
loosely laid ceramic floor or wall tiles (NO glue or grout)
loosely laid slate tiles
loosely laid sandstone pavers
kitchen grade absorbant paper toweling

'
mealworms are OK for him as he's a big boy and can handle them , BUT as a treat only, maybe 4 at a time , they love the pupae and beetles too.

do you think he will be okay since it was just 1 time? I will be removing the walnut bedding as soon as the dragon wakes up. They gave us a cage for him too, which has tile/slate looking floor.<<< keep the slate stuff , it's fine as his bedding. They are removeable, which i see a lot of owners on here believe that is good for them. The tank has a black coil looking bulb that gives off heat, so if its the same bulb ive been reading about on here, its bad?!? its mounted to the side of the wall inside the enclosure, and we put his log under it so he can climb up and sit under it. Theres also an under cabinet light in there. Not sure which bulb is in there, ill be looking into that later today when he wakes up. Ive been reading mixed info on the ideal temperatures. There is a temperature strip on the side where the black bulb is, and a round dial type thermometer on the other side.. what is the ideal temperatures for hot side and cold side, and night and day time? I have everything in his cage off right now, since its night, which is what my husband said to do. I have a gun thermometer its about 75 in there right now.. He is sleeping on his log right now though and has black stripes. Is it safe to leave the heat bulb running all night? I uploaded pics of him earlier with his light on, and one with the flash since his light was off, that was taken a few minutes ago. Im wondering if the dark color is normal. Im not even sure if he is actually a he, or how to tell. He is pretty big though, which is another thing i wanted to upload the picture for, to see if anyone could give a rough estimate of his age. I also added pictures of the bulb and his cage so i could get some advice. Also, are the food and water bowls ok?

I'm guessing that lettuce my husband put in there is no good for him? ?Sorry for the long post, i am just worried about him now because of the walnuts and reading about the bulbs and stuff. He is an awesome dragon! He is soo super sweet and chill and i want to give him the best. I feel like a failure already, especially since i was confident that my husband knew what he was doing?im worried about the dragon can someone please give me some advice before i worry myself to death!!???

<<< he's a dead ringer for my recently passed girl Rex .... seeing the picture brought tears to my eyes .... looks just like she did when she was enjoying her sunny window or basking under her UVB200 and 80W par38 bulb, or having a lovely mommy or daddy snuggle (except she'd be glowing and showing her happy colours when having mommy or daddy snuggles. --i am so sorry to hear about your dragon❤?

Click to expand...

Terry15 · Apr 25, 2017

He looks so cute & totally chilled. He seems to like cuddling and keeping the light out of his eyes. He is a good list of things they can eat. I keep it on my phone, that way when I'm in the grocery store I will try different veggies for him.
http://www.beautifuldragons.com/Nutrition.html

NoelBaby503 · Apr 25, 2017

Terry15":pkr0sed1 said:
He looks so cute & totally chilled. He seems to like cuddling and keeping the light out of his eyes. He is a good list of things they can eat. I keep it on my phone, that way when I'm in the grocery store I will try different veggies for him.
http://www.beautifuldragons.com/Nutrition.html

THANK YOU!!

kingofnobbys · Apr 25, 2017

Forgot to color up these comments above so repeating them incase you missed them ...

A 26W UVB200 will be much better as the UVB150 is only rated at 5% UVB. He'll get very little UVA and UVB from a 13W UVB150 at 10 inches , but will be good with a 26W UVB200 , even better if you put a dome reflector around it and aim it at the basking spot. ie the dome from one of these http://www.thatpetplace.com/black-heat-light-reflector-dome-with-ceramic-socket

A better option still is a Zoo Med OS-24 T8 UVB10.0 24" 17W tube inplace of the GE tube you show which emits virtually zero UVA and zero UVB , whereas the Zoo Med 17W 24" T8 UVB10.0 is rated to produce 10% UVB and about 30% UVB and in your tank will give beardie better UVA and UVB over more of the tank.
see http://www.uvguide.co.uk/phototherapyphosphor-tests.htm

An Arcadia 12%UVB T8 will be even better http://www.arcadia-reptile.com/fluorescent-lamps/t8-d3plus-desert/
Either the Zoo Med 10%UVB T8 or Arcadia 12%UVB T8 will be much better for your beardie with a reflector like this slipped behind the tube http://arcadia-reptile.com/fluorescent-lamp-reflectors-t5t8/
see this report for how a reflector helps by near doubling the UVA and UVB seen by the lizard
http://www.uvguide.co.uk/fluorescenttubereflectortests.htm

I use 26W UVB200s in all my tanks (4ftx2ftx1.5ft) and 100L raring tubs , but will be upgrading to Arcadia 24W 24" T5 12%UVB tubes when I build Peppa and Toothless big new homes (Rex's and Puff's tanks being old and dilapidated and a bit of rough DIYS job (by your's truly several years ago) and in storage in my shed now.

PLEASE HELP! NEW OWNER IN NEED OF SERIOUS ADVICE!

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